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You are here: Home / Archives for inner doubts

Avoiding Negative Drivers

August 31, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Just to clarify, by “negative drivers,” I don’t mean people with road rage or people who tailgate.

“Drivers” are best thought of as models for inner patterns that influence our thinking, feeling and therefore the behavior we will do. Since they begin when we’re small children, one can say they are the voices of external authorities such as our parents. When we’re very young, we need our parents to direct us. However, as we age, we must take a look at what “drives” our behaviors and decide whether they’re still helping us or harming us. (For a great overview of drivers, follow this link.)

The five main drivers are:

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Happiness, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Perfectionsim, Psychology, Success Tagged With: human psychology, inner dialog, inner dialogue, inner doubts, inner voices, parenting, psychological impact

Believe in Yourself as Much as you Believe in Others

August 25, 2014 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

hands-reaching-outWe are incredibly supportive of our friends and our family.

When they doubt themselves, we are easily able to inspire, encourage, and invigorate them up with all sorts of compliments. As importantly, we truly believe what we’re telling them too.

Yet, when we are talking about ourselves we are not as good of a friend.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Asking for help, Communicating, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Self Talk, Success Tagged With: encouragement, family, friendships, frustration, inner doubts, negative self talk, overcoming obstacles, self talk, support

How to Get Whatever You Want

October 2, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Sigh… if only everything we wanted just – poof! – materialized.

magic_hat_and_wand

Rather, anything we desire comes to us only through a very specific process – if it arrives at all. It matters not whether it’s trivial, mundane, or life altering. There is an unalterable four-step progression. More importantly, that entire sequence moves forward based entirely on the words we use in our heads.

Step one: I realize I want something.

Many times, we mistakenly say, “need;” but in actuality, it’s “want.” After all, if we were really motivated to go after what we needed, we’d all be healthy and fit with great attitudes and perfect relationships, wouldn’t we? We take action – or we don’t, because we want to – or don’t, NOT because we need to.

Let’s use a specific example: The holidays are nigh and I know I will see family. Neither wanting snide comments nor condescending sneers, I decide to drop a few pounds. To my previous point, I’ve needed to lose weight for some time, but until I wanted to, I was not motivated. Now, having entered this “acceptance stage,” I acknowledge that not only do I need to – but also I actually want the results that will come from it.

I am in motion.

Upon acceptance, the search for validation that it can or cannot be achieved commences.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Beliefs, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles, Overcoming Perfectionsim, Power of Attitude, Self Talk Tagged With: acceptance, beliefs, i am, i can, i need, i want, I will, inner doubts, inner voices, limiting beliefs

Here Come the Fitness Ads!

December 29, 2010 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

As much as I appreciate the the Holidays, one has to admit it possess a downside: the relentless, unceasing, non-stop drone of promotions, commercials, and ads; loosely wrapped in pseudo-emotion by manipulative agencies pretending to appear as caring; with a primary objective being no more than inflating their coffers at our expense.

I do not consider all shopkeepers as greedy and soulless. Most are you and I, working their day-to-day, attempting to keep their heads above water. I also take no issue with profitability; we each must pay our bills. I am self-employed and therefore extremely aware of what it’s like to stare at the ceiling all night concerned how to pay my vendors, keep the government satisfied; and still claim some folding money for my family.

But can we be honest? After 132 renditions of the “Night Before Christmas” re-written into unusual off-tone radio commercials, can we unite hand-in-hand and admit that it wears down the psyche?

Deepak Chopra, lecturer and author, stated in December, “We are spending money we don’t have to buy things we don’t need to impress people we don’t like.”

Ouch. That kind of hurts; but “why?”

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, goals, mental health, Newspaper Column, Power of Attitude, resolutions, Self Talk Tagged With: deepak chopra, fitness scams, habit change, inner doubts, inner truth, new year's resolutions, night before christmas, pride, resolutions that stick, self esteem, why resolutions fail

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