You Just Never Know…

August 17, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus

Early morning routine: Jack, my dog, and I are taking our walk. His leash is in my hand, my headphones are clamped over my ears; I am absorbed in the back-and-forth of my favorite podcast. Jack and I; just doin’ our thing.

The neighborhood is residential; no major thoroughfares, so I’m quite cognizant of the large diesel truck that rattles up next to us and slows down. Matching my pace, the driver waves at me. I assume he’s just being friendly so I return the action, figuring he knows me from my decades of living in a smaller community.

He gestures again, this time I recognize he’s motioning me to come over. Pulling Jack’s leash in tight, we walk on to the street and approach the open passenger window.

The white truck’s interior is clean, uncluttered, and modern, with a flat screen in the center of the dashboard. As for its only passenger, he appears to be in his forties, healthy, short-cropped hair, and brandishing a smile as big as the vehicle and as warm as its motor.

Leaning toward me across the center console, he opens, “You probably don’t remember me…”

He’s correct.

“…About 25 years ago, I applied for a job working for you. You didn’t hire me.”

“I’m sorry.” A slight rumbling of anxiety bubbles in my belly. Is this some form of latent workplace revenge?

[Read more…]

Stop Worrying so Much

August 15, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Worry is interest on a debt not yet owed.

We get confused. We think if we can just worry “hard enough,” we can make things go better.

Logically, that doesn’t make sense. But this isn’t about logic. It’s about emotion.

If something is worrying you, follow this simple plan:

1) Ask yourself, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” If the answer is minimal, refocus your thoughts on something else.
2) If it’s severe, ask yourself, “Can I do anything about this?”
3) If the answer is “no,” it’s time to get support and let go. If the answer is “yes,” it’s time to do something.

No path leads to more worrying.

Worrying depletes your ability to solve the tough problems, and ruins your mood the remainder of the time.

Note: Every Monday, a new motivational memo is posted. Subscribers to ThisTimeIMeanIt.com’s coaching service get this – and many more benefits – sent to them directly. If you’d like to know more, follow this link.

Who do You Think You Are? How We Describe Ourself Matters

August 10, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

I have a very unassuming, quick-response question.

Don’t ponder the answer; just blurt it out. Ready? (Um, that’s not the question.)

Here we go: “Who are you?”

At first blush, it’s such an innocuous query and our replies come by rote. We provide our name. But, in reality, that’s not accurate, because my name is not WHO I am, it’s WHAT I am called; it’s a label.

Okay, take it down a level: Who is — in my case — Scott Marcus?

Well, I could reply, “a man,” “father,” or even “American.” Those are all true — and actually more descriptive than responding with my name. They deliver more detail, but are still painfully vague. One person’s “man” creates images of football players, while another’s is an accountant, neither of which fit me. Piling on additional descriptors becomes the next step, “56 year old speaker, writer, father of two sons, married, lives in Eureka.”

Certainly this constructs a more vibrant portrayal, but it is still soooooo scratching the surface. For example, should I move from my coastal community to the Arizona desert, would I then be a different person? Better yet, am I still the same person I was a few years ago, or do every 365 days establish a new being?

Circumstances change, but that alone does not mean we are no longer who we were; there is a consistency that remains our core. These modifiers therefore, no matter how many we use, are not answering the core issue. Something lacks.

So, why does this matter?

[Read more…]

The Route to De-stress is through the Heart

August 4, 2011 by Featured Author Leave a Comment

Stress creates a huge impact on your mind and body.

Stress might have a slow or a sudden effect on your heart. It might lead to heart diseases and even a life-threatening heart attack. Stress is an unavoidable part of our life; it is not possible to get rid of stress. All you can do is avoid it or find ways to deal with it. You need to take care of yourself first to take care of others. Pay attention to the needs of your body and mind in order to take care of yourself. Follow a few rules of life to deal with stress and see the difference in your health.

Symptoms of stress

Symptoms of stress are sleeplessness, aches and pain, losing and gaining weight, etc. Recognizing the symptoms and working on them is very important to live a healthy life.

Management

Give yourself enough time: Very often we forget ourselves. Remember yourself first, if you want a happy and healthy heart. Be good to yourself and give yourself enough time.

Have food that is healthy for your heart: Avoid food that is full of trans-fats such as a lot of fried food, fast food, cakes, etc. Restrict yourself from taking in a lot or refined sugar. Use food that helps to reduce cholesterol like extra virgin olive oil and garlic with your daily food. Use fish oil as it is very good for your heart and is a source of omega 3 fatty acid.

Have a balanced diet: Your food needs to include everything from minerals to vitamins, proteins, iron, carbohydrate and even fats in a proper proportion. Make sure the food that you consume contains everything your body needs. Make sure you have a balanced diet. [Read more…]

26 “Starting Over” Tips From People Who Have Done It

August 2, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

By Mary Lee Gannon

This week I had the pleasure of profiling 11 successful individuals who have had to start their lives over.

Their stories vary from being laid off to dodging bombs in Bosnia to losing their mother to murder to divorce to the death of a husband. All of these champions overcame immense challenges to meet with professional and personal success. What I have done below is tried to capture for you some common themes in things they shared with me so that you may learn from others who have truly succeeded at their own personal turnaround.

1. Stopped being a victim.

2. Get support, create self-awareness and figure out what is your fear and what are the obstacles that are getting in the way.

3. Set goals daily.

4. Be willing to do whatever it takes.

5. Stay positive. Surround yourself with only positive people.

6. Write out 10 things every day for which you are grateful.

7. Your feelings need to be validated so you can let them go. Covering them up with “positive thinking” is a band-aid at best. Do something frivolous for yourself. Life has just dealt you a blow, and you must find a way to tell yourself that you are on your side. It need not cost a fortune…..perhaps it’s a massage, a special brew of coffee, or flowers or a facial or a new CD or a manicure. But you definitely want to send a loving message of support to your psyche. [Read more…]

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