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Working Hard at Relaxing

August 24, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

I’m not dead.

At least when I wrote that; I wasn’t. Being the intelligent reader of this column, you put two and two together and surmised that in a flash. Hopefully, as you read this, I am still in the not-dead state of being — and shall remain so for decades yet to come.

Having proven therefore that I understand very little about what it’s like to die, you will cut me slack about not really knowing — but safely assuming — that no one’s last words were ever, “I wish I would have spent more time working and less time enjoying life.”

We would agree, wouldn’t we?

So, then what’s the deal with non-stop, dawn-to-dusk, 24/7, busy-making? We don’t ever just “chill.” Well, at least I don’t; maybe you do, but I’ll bet dollars to donuts that you’re in the same place. There’s so much to get done with so few hours to do it.

Forty-hour workweek; what’s that?

Wake up. Shower. Shave. Throw some frozen waffles down your gullet while checking the mail and packing lunches. Get the kids to school, pick them up, and beat feet to soccer practice and gymnastics. Straightaway back, homework, meals, brush teeth, and off to bed. To accomplish everything requires groundwork: grocery and clothes shopping, housecleaning, home maintenance, and car servicing. These necessitate steady income — and, oh yes — have you heard the news about the economy? You better not slack off at work or they’ll swap you out quicker than a DVD rental on a Saturday night. So, off to the salt mines, bringing our assignments home so we can get them on our kitchen tables in the morning and the bed stands at night. We’re work harder while having the privilege of paying more for everything. Come end of day, it’s drop like a lead brick off a six-foot wall.

It’s no wonder we don’t have time for “a life.” Or do we?

My sister phones, “What are you up to?” She asks.

I reply, “I’m working hard at relaxing.”

Stop the clock. Re-read that response please: “I’m working hard at relaxing.” Huh? That statement makes as much sense as “same difference,” or “kosher ham;” but I swear it was my reply and I’m betting you relate. Our lives are so cluttered, that if tasks were boxes, we’d be featured on the TV series “Hoarders.” No longer are we human beings, we have become “human doings.”

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Happiness, Inspiration, mental health, Newspaper Column, Productivity, Relationships Tagged With: 40-hour workweek, busyness, enjoying life, exhaustion, hoarders, home maintenance, inspiration, lifestyle change, overwork, priorities, quality of life, relationships, relaxing, salt mines, stress, work-a-holic

Video: Ryan Gosling Stops New York Street Fight (Really)

August 23, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

I started following the Good News Network awhile ago. (After all, don’t we need some good news periodically?) I’ve followed up on a few things I’ve seen them post (such as the “What Makes a Good Place to Live” post in June). Tonight, I see that Ryan Gosling actually broke up a New York street fight.

You can see the whole thing unfold in this video (be aware, this is a real fight so it might not be appropriate for smaller children).

You can find the whole story at the Good News Network page here.

It is a little disheartening that no one else stepped in and that those filming it didn’t call for help, but that doesn’t take away from Mr. Gosling. I’ve liked him as an actor since “Lars and Real Girl,” and now respect him on more than one level.

Filed Under: Beliefs, Conflict Management, Current Events, Inspiration, Misc, Video Tagged With: attitude, conflict, disagreement, good news network, inspiration, new york, priorities, ryan gosling, street fight

Monday Motivational Memo: Overcoming Sadness & Fear

August 22, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

When changing your habits, do not focus on what you have to give up; look toward what you will receive in the end. 

Change involves letting go of something, whether it’s a relationship or a way of life. That can be sad or frightening. Since no one WANTS to feel those, we tend to hang on longer than it’s healthier or productive to do so.

If, however, we turn our attention towards what we will receive from the change, it’s more inspirational. We are more inclined to move in the direction of what we want.

If you’re feeling stuck in your progress, it helps to remind yourself more of why you’re moving forward and less of what you have to give up to get it.

Note: Every Monday, a new motivational memo is posted. Subscribers to ThisTimeIMeanIt.com’s coaching service get this – and many more benefits – sent to them directly. If you’d like to know more, follow this link.

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Change, Gratitude, Happiness, Inspiration, Member Benefits, mental health, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Temptation, Self Talk Tagged With: attitude, change, coaching service, emotions, fear, inspiration, intention, perception is reality, relationship, sadness, thankfulness, way of life

You Just Never Know…

August 17, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus

Early morning routine: Jack, my dog, and I are taking our walk. His leash is in my hand, my headphones are clamped over my ears; I am absorbed in the back-and-forth of my favorite podcast. Jack and I; just doin’ our thing.

The neighborhood is residential; no major thoroughfares, so I’m quite cognizant of the large diesel truck that rattles up next to us and slows down. Matching my pace, the driver waves at me. I assume he’s just being friendly so I return the action, figuring he knows me from my decades of living in a smaller community.

He gestures again, this time I recognize he’s motioning me to come over. Pulling Jack’s leash in tight, we walk on to the street and approach the open passenger window.

The white truck’s interior is clean, uncluttered, and modern, with a flat screen in the center of the dashboard. As for its only passenger, he appears to be in his forties, healthy, short-cropped hair, and brandishing a smile as big as the vehicle and as warm as its motor.

Leaning toward me across the center console, he opens, “You probably don’t remember me…”

He’s correct.

“…About 25 years ago, I applied for a job working for you. You didn’t hire me.”

“I’m sorry.” A slight rumbling of anxiety bubbles in my belly. Is this some form of latent workplace revenge?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Gratitude, Happiness, Hope, Inspiration, Intentions, Motivation, Newspaper Column Tagged With: anxiety, attitude, feelings, inspiration, intention, laugh, million dollars, morning routine, old friend, quality of life, relationships, smile, thankfulness

Stop Worrying so Much

August 15, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Worry is interest on a debt not yet owed.

Is it worth being upset?

We get confused. We think if we can just worry “hard enough,” we can make things go better.

Logically, that doesn’t make sense. But this isn’t about logic. It’s about emotion.

If something is worrying you, follow this simple plan:

1) Ask yourself, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” If the answer is minimal, refocus your thoughts on something else.
2) If it’s severe, ask yourself, “Can I do anything about this?”
3) If the answer is “no,” it’s time to get support and let go. If the answer is “yes,” it’s time to do something.

No path leads to more worrying.

Worrying depletes your ability to solve the tough problems, and ruins your mood the remainder of the time.

Note: Every Monday, a new motivational memo is posted. Subscribers to ThisTimeIMeanIt.com’s coaching service get this – and many more benefits – sent to them directly. If you’d like to know more, follow this link.

Filed Under: Asking for help, Happiness, Inspiration, Member Benefits, mental health, Motivation, Motivational Monday, Power of Attitude, Self Talk Tagged With: attitude, change, emotion, emotions, feelings, inspiration, logic, motivation, perception is reality, priorities, quality of life, simple plan, stress, weekly updates, worry

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