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You are here: Home / Archives for pleasure

Rewarding Yourself for Changing Habits

November 8, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

How do you reward yourself for the changes you’re making?

This is not a rhetorical question. We engage in our habits (whether negative or positive) because we get some benefit from them.

First rule of habit change

The first rule of habit change says that when the pain from the “side effect” of the habit outweighs the benefit of the habit itself (e.g. when the frustration of gaining weight is more painful than the pleasure of eating) then it’s time to make a change. However, one does not just “drop” a habit, s/he has to replace it with a “counter-productive habit.” In other words, find something else to replace the void left by getting rid of the problem habit. If you don’t do this, it makes it more painful.

For example, instead of simply saying, “I won’t eat when stressed anymore,” which makes one even more stressed out, triggering the habit you were trying to stop; it’s smarter to say, “When I’m stressed, I’ll take a walk.”

The problem with changing habits

Although this is a good first step, it’s important to remember that the habit you’re trying to change was providing a benefit, so even though the new habit is helpful, it’s still uncomfortable, making you less likely to continue. That’s why it’s important to reward your “inner child” when you make a change. If every time you resisted your problem habit, you were to reward yourself, the change would be:

  • More exciting
  • Less painful
  • Quicker

The problem is how do we change these habits?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Asking for help, Change, goals, Habits, Overcoming Temptation, planning Tagged With: bad habits, change, changing habits, frustration, gaining weight, habit change, happiness, inner child, lifestyle change, new patterns, pleasure, resolutions that stick, reward basket, reward bucket, rewards, stress

Ted Video: Dan Gilbert asks, Why are we happy?

September 30, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

This is an amazing video! It will take you about 20 minutes but it will give you insights into the difference between natural and synthesized happiness. And what’s most amazing to me is the conclusion Dan Gilbert, the presenter, draws (based on scientific data) about whether we’re happier when we have unlimited choices or when our choices are more narrow. (There are also some profound political implications in what he says at the end.)

Watch it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Happiness, Inspiration, Power of Attitude, Video Tagged With: attitude, dan gilbert, emotions, feelings, happiness, insights, natural happiness, pleasure, quality of life, study of happiness, synthesized happiness, ted video, why we are happy

Don’t Forget Life for Work: Keep a Balance

August 11, 2011 by Featured Author Leave a Comment

Forgetting life for work?

Not able to maintain a social life and work life balance? Well, the answer to these questions would be YES! No one intends to forget their personal life, but in today’s competitive world the nature of the work is so hard-hitting that you can never remain disconnected from it. You are expected to do more than you actually can in one day. The pressure of your work comes along with you when you reach home. This pressure creates stress which can be harmful for you and as well as your personal life.

Maintaining a balance between work and pleasure is necessary.

For a healthy life, your work and leisure activities should travel together. Sometimes work will take the front seat and sometimes leisure. Only work or only leisure will lead to an unhealthy lifestyle affecting your body, mind and your surroundings.

Read below to find out ways in which you can create or at least try to create a work-life balance

[Read more…]

Filed Under: goals, Guest Author, Health, planning, Productivity, Relationships Tagged With: change, family and friends, guest author, leisure activities, leisure activity, lifestyle change, personal life, pleasure, quality of life, quality time, stress, tension, unhealthy lifestyle, weight loss, work life balance

Hanging Out With a Better Class of People

May 25, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus

For the majority of presentations I conduct, I administer an on-line anonymous survey to get a better feel for what’s going on inside the organization.

Question number one is, “On a typical day, how would you rate your attitude?”

Respondents choose from five answers:

  • Extremely upbeat
  • Pretty Good
  • Average
  • Below average
  • Extremely poor

I’ll fess up the fact that it’s not a very scientific question, but neither do you need to work for NASA to answer it. In a nutshell, it’s a fancy way of saying, “How ya’ doin’?”

Out of the thousands who have responded, approximately 79 percent have said that their average-day attitude is “pretty good” or “extremely upbeat.” In effect, that could mean that you — the person reading this — has about an 79 percent chance of saying your attitude (most of the time) falls in one of those two categories. (By the way, only one percent responds “extremely poor.”)

Another way to parse that would be, if we were to ask people to use a one-to-ten scale, with the highest number being “ecstatic,” and the bottom being “suicidal;” the regular person on an ordinary day would say, “It’s about eight.”

Question two rates in the same fashion the attitude of those with whom we interact most often: family members, co-workers, and friends. Here the indicator slides to 52 percent. Using the same interpretation as above, that implies that we feel that, although we’d give ourselves an “eight,” we’d label others a “five.” (Imagine how much it would deteriorate if they didn’t have the pleasure of our charming, upbeat positivity to buoy their sagging moods!)

Finally, question three inquires about, “The attitude of those with whom you come in contact on a daily basis?” That scope involves everyone else we bump into, such as clerks, attendants, or phone reps, in effect the river of population flowing across our paths in a typical 24-hour period.

Using the same measuring scale, we sense that only about 31 percent of “those people” possess a “pretty good” or “extremely upbeat” outlook. To spin that yet one more way, we feel that only about one out of three, or one-third, of everyone we meet has a better-than-average attitude.

YourAttitude

In summation [Read more…]

Filed Under: Communicating, Conflict Management, Intentions, International Inspiration Index, mental health, Newspaper Column, Poll or Survey, Power of Attitude, Psychology, Relationships, Self Talk Tagged With: anonymous survey, attitude, co workers, family members, perceptions, pleasure, typical day

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