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You are here: Home / Archives for new patterns

Creatures of Habit

April 30, 2014 by Scott "Q" Marcus

Have you ever really truly analyzed how much of what we do is by rote?

habit-creature

Paying for groceries, the clerk asks,
“How are you?”

Our expected reply, stated without thought:
“Fine, how are you?”

Continuing the script she responds, “Great,” and upon finishing the transaction, adds the obligatory, “Have a nice day.”

Did she really care?

Should we opt to spill our guts about the problems we’re having with aging, would she request the other shoppers stand elsewhere while she counseled, consoled, and cajoled us? Survey says: Not a chance. The brief exchange near the cash register is a pre-ordained, almost-required, nicety; it’s just “what we do.”

That just scratches the surface; dig deeper and discover how much of our lives are run by autopilot.

Picture a typical weekday; we either arise with the help of an alarm — that pushes us to consciousness at the exact same moment as every other weekday — or we don’t use one at all. Upon rising, patterns control everything from the order of our morning constitutional to the clothes we choose. We are either “breakfast eaters” — or not. It’s not “I am” one day and “I’m not” the next. The average grocery store stocks over 40,000 items; yet even those of us who opt for breakfast choose from fewer than a handful of items every morning, the same selections we had yesterday and will eat tomorrow.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Habits, Happiness, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles, Success Tagged With: attitude, changing habits, choices, control, new patterns, old habits, repetitive behaviors

Do 1 New Thing Every Day

March 18, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Make time each and every day to try one new thing.

New-blastIt doesn’t have to be big. It doesn’t have to be complicated. It doesn’t have to be scary.

As examples:

  • Walk down a new street
  • Try a new recipe
  • Add 5 minutes into your fitness regimen (or start one)
  • Leave a note for your spouse, partner, or child
  • Read the first few pages in a book you’ve been planning to open
  • Go to bed earlier (or later)
  • Try a new fruit

In effect, change up your pattern.

Research shows that we do better with our established patterns if we also try new patterns. (Plus it’s fun.)

Shake it up today – and have some fun!

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Motivational Monday Tagged With: change, inspiration index, lifestyle change, new patterns

Rewarding Yourself for Changing Habits

November 8, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

How do you reward yourself for the changes you’re making?

This is not a rhetorical question. We engage in our habits (whether negative or positive) because we get some benefit from them.

First rule of habit change

The first rule of habit change says that when the pain from the “side effect” of the habit outweighs the benefit of the habit itself (e.g. when the frustration of gaining weight is more painful than the pleasure of eating) then it’s time to make a change. However, one does not just “drop” a habit, s/he has to replace it with a “counter-productive habit.” In other words, find something else to replace the void left by getting rid of the problem habit. If you don’t do this, it makes it more painful.

For example, instead of simply saying, “I won’t eat when stressed anymore,” which makes one even more stressed out, triggering the habit you were trying to stop; it’s smarter to say, “When I’m stressed, I’ll take a walk.”

The problem with changing habits

Although this is a good first step, it’s important to remember that the habit you’re trying to change was providing a benefit, so even though the new habit is helpful, it’s still uncomfortable, making you less likely to continue. That’s why it’s important to reward your “inner child” when you make a change. If every time you resisted your problem habit, you were to reward yourself, the change would be:

  • More exciting
  • Less painful
  • Quicker

The problem is how do we change these habits?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Asking for help, Change, goals, Habits, Overcoming Temptation, planning Tagged With: bad habits, change, changing habits, frustration, gaining weight, habit change, happiness, inner child, lifestyle change, new patterns, pleasure, resolutions that stick, reward basket, reward bucket, rewards, stress

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