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You are here: Home / Archives for frustration

Spinning in my Head: Driving Myself Crazy

April 26, 2017 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

You and I, we’ve been together quite some time, right?

So, if I let you in on my inner workings, you won’t think less of me? I mean, I’m opening myself up to being vulnerable, okay? Thanks.

There’s an expression: “Mother Nature bats last.” Well, yep, she sure does – and she hits it out of the park. 

The original plan for this weekend was to drive south for a meeting with one of the companies with whom I work. Alas, the main highway between here and there is smothered with the third in a series of major rock and mud slides, cutting off traffic in both directions, with no estimated time of re-opening. It stands to reason that despite the valiant attempts of CalTrans to hold back the mountain, the road shall remain blocked, locking me in Humboldt unless I wish to add about eight hours of mountain driving each way. (For the record, I do not so wish.)

 

Welcome to life on the rustic, rocky, rural, redwood coast of northern California.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Habits, humor, Newspaper Column, Power of Attitude Tagged With: attitude, fear, frustration, humor, overcoming setbacks, quality of life

Where do WE go Now That the 2016 Elections Are Over?

November 14, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus

I rarely wade into the political arena for a variety of reasons:

  • That’s not what my Monday Memo is about
  • It brings the trolls out in droves
  • I’m “conflict resistant” and don’t like arguing
  • As important as political discourse is, lately it seem like it’s just plain “icky”

Having said that, elections have consequences and here we sit, almost one week out, with a new president-elect.

Half of the country is optimistic, the other half is despondent. One half feels that we have found our way back, while their counterparts fear for the future. No matter how you cut it, the country is laid raw, exposed, split half and half. (I will not state who I voted for so don’t ask – and that’s not what today’s comments are about anyway.)

The question is, “What do WE do NOW?”

Some on the victorious side of the election shout, “We won! Get over it!” while many on the opposite side are protesting with chants such as “Not my president.” Although it might not seem like it at first glance, but these are the opening of lines of communication. Granted, it’s not a warm and fuzzy channel, but both sides are speaking – and while not necessarily trying to speak with each other, they’re being heard.

The way I see it, there are some realities that need to be addressed:

  • Barring some sort of seismic political earthquake, love it or hate it, Mr. Trump will be the 45th President of the United States come January 20, 2017
  • No matter what happens, there will continue to be detractors and supporters of his presidency
  • Neither side will “vanish” nor be silenced
  • Both sides will continue to work for their agendas
  • Neither side will simply “give up”

Accepting those, as we begin this new era, the first question we must all ask of ourselves is “What is MY intention for the future as we move forward?”

Without intention, we are rudderless, adrift.

For example, if the intention is “Let’s block everything that President Trump does,” the resultant communication – and its actions – will lead us down one path. If our intention is, “Show the ‘losers’ whose in charge now,” that will also have repercussions. However, if the intention is, “Let’s find a way to agree on what we can while politically fighting that where we don’t,” other options will make themselves known.

It’s certainly not a guarantee of success; but lack of intention is surely a guarantee for more conflict for decades to come.

We’re all (hopefully) going to be here for quite some time. Neither side will eradicate the other. Aiming to push, shove, or bully those with whom we might disagree will only prolong this chasm we see between us. Worse yet, there are real-life implications: millions and millions or our fellow human beings (both within and outside of the U.S.) will be hurt, further expanding the divide, making it yet harder to heal (which I assume is a goal of most).

I believe in “compassion first.”

Don’t get me wrong, that doesn’t mean “give in,” but it does mean that first and foremost, I will treat each and every person neither as my superior nor inferior. I will strive  in all my communication with those with whom I disagree, to lay a bedrock of respect, seeking first to understand the motives without judgment. I’m not fooling myself (I hope) I know it won’t always be easy, but – to me – it’s the only path forward.

I hope you’ll join me.

Filed Under: Communicating, Current Events, Intentions, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Special Tagged With: attitude, better relationships, communication, conflict, conflict resolution, frustration, political discourse, politicians, politics, priorities, resolutions

Three Ways to Improve Your Attitude When it Goes Off the Tracks

May 16, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

train wreck

I don’t care how hard one tries to “look on the bright side.” There are times when “stuff” happens and it’s just plain difficult to get back to an upbeat view.

These three tips will help you feel better quickly.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Happiness, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Power of Attitude Tagged With: attitude, attitude change, bad attitude, frustration, how to improve your attitude, poor attitude, positive attitude, quality of life, stress

Ask the Right Questions to get the Right Results

November 9, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

If you’re not happy with the results, maybe you need to change the question.

One reason so many people lose weight — and then unhappily put it back on again — is because they ask of themselves the wrong question.

They ask themselves the wrong question, “How long will it take?”

Based on that question, they will seek out the answers that focus on speed and never learn how to maintain their weight since that wasn’t in the question.

If the question is “What do I need to do to lose weight and keep it off while staying healthy?”

Here are some  powerful questions to ask yourself:

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Diet, Failure, goals, Health, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, planning, Weight Loss Tagged With: asking questions, desired results, frustration, lifestyle change, unexpected results, weight loss, your better self

Have Realistic Expectations

April 6, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Have Realistic expectations of habit change.

When you decide to change a bad habit, there are two things to remember:

1) It will take longer than you expect
2) It will be more difficult than you would prefer

However… [Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Diet, goals, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Weight Loss Tagged With: difficult times, expectation, frustration, unrealistic expectations

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