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How to Improve Your Communication: Slow Down & Regroup

April 23, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

If you ever find yourself saying, “I told you 1,000 times…” that means YOU ARE not communicating.

It does NOT mean they are not listening.

Communication is not an exact science by any stretch of the imagination. There is a great deal of “noise” that can inhibit clear communication

“Noise” is anything that inhibits that communication.

It can be actual noise, or it can be

cultural differences
attitude
physical attributes
one’s past history
even one’s health can cause a breakdown in communication.

The next time you find yourself being frustrated that someone does not seem to “get what you’re saying,” don’t get mad.

Instead, realize that YOU need to try a different method to be heard.

Slow down, regroup, and try it differently.

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What Success Feels Like

April 16, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

THIS is what success feels like.

We think that “success” is always “out there,” in a far away place. Because of that thought process, we feel inadequate and frustrated.

The reality is we can draw the boundaries of success to be wherever we want them to be.

Maybe we aren’t at our correct weights, but we’re closer to them. Maybe our finances aren’t in the shape we want them, but they’re getting closer. Maybe our relationships aren’t where they could be, but they’re improving.

Isn’t positive movement the “real” definition of success?

Reward yourself. You’re doing better than you think.

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Exchange Gratitude for Frustration

March 19, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

The key to happiness is understanding a “good” life is not a “perfect” life.

It is simply a good life “more times than not.”

When we get frustrated about how “lousy” our lives appear to be, it’s time to take a look at the big picture.

Odds are, we’re comparing reality to a perfect, idyllic image of life; which is never going to happen.

Slow down, focus on what’s going well (especially when it seems like that’s a very short list). Take a deep breath. Smile (even you feel like it’s a forced smile).

Then, look back again on where you are. It will be better.

The funny thing is nothing changed except your perception.

[Read more…]

Not Deciding to Decide (or Vice Versa)

March 12, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

“Not to decide” is indeed to decide.

Whether we actively make a decision, or we say to ourselves, “Let’s see how this goes for a little while longer,” we are still making a decision.

In one case, we’re owning what we do, accepting the consequences, empowering ourselves to take action.

In the other case – although we’re still making a decision – we are giving up control, opting to remain a victim to what happens.

It’s OK to take time to “think about things.”

But don’t fool yourself, you’re also opting to accept things as they are, and that too is a decision.

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Overcoming Resistance to Change

February 20, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Rarely – if at all – does anyone WANT to change.

The results of the change are what actually motivate us.

Keep your focus on those.

“Logically,” we usually know what to do to improve our health and our lives. We just don’t do it.

Why?

Usually, it’s because we’re focusing on the mental work it takes. That seems taxing and overwhelming and not worth the effort. Therefore, we quit.

The key is to focus on the benefits you will receive by doing the work. For example, don’t focus on how hard it is to stick to your diet; picture how you’ll feel in one hour when you’ve resisted the habit.

In effect, focus on where you will be from your efforts, not what it’s taking to achieve them.

[Read more…]

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How to Improve Your Communication: Slow Down & Regroup

If you ever find yourself saying, “I told you 1,000 times…” that means YOU ARE not communicating.

It does NOT mean they are not listening.

Slow down, regroup, and try it differently.

What Success Feels Like

THIS is what success feels like.

Reward yourself. You’re doing better than you think.

Exchange Gratitude for Frustration

The key to happiness is understanding a “good” life is not a “perfect” life.

It is simply a good life “more times than not.”

The funny thing is nothing changed except your perception.

Not Deciding to Decide (or Vice Versa)

“Not to decide” is indeed to decide.

But don’t fool yourself, you’re also opting to accept things as they are, and that too is a decision.

Overcoming Resistance to Change

Rarely – if at all – does anyone WANT to change.

The results of the change are what actually motivate us.

Keep your focus on those.

In effect, focus on where you will be from your efforts, not what it’s taking to achieve them.

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