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You are here: Home / Archives for losing weight

It’s Really Not That Difficult

February 13, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Sometimes — one might even argue “always” — wisdom and truth are found in the most basic statements.

maze-and-question-mark

One of the simplest, yet most empowering comments I have heard is from Dr. Sue Morter. Aside from being a powerhouse speaker, she’s extremely inspirational, a dynamo on the stage, and outstandingly wise.

“So, what did liberating life-altering observation did she lay pass unto you?” You ask, breathless with anticipation.

“It’s difficult until it isn’t.”

“Huh? That’s it?”

Yep; five words; seven if you don’t count contractions. But, consider the message in that unvarnished declaration. Most of what we want for ourselves is really not difficult to obtain. We possess the tools (or know where to get them) and we know what we desire; all we have to do is go get it. The hitch in the giddy up is how we assemble the plan, making it complex and complicated. We smother it with all makeup of parameters to which we really cannot — or do not want to — abide. We spend so much energy building the golden pathway that we’re too exhausted to walk upon it.

As case in point, how ‘bout we look at losing weight?

(Wow, who would think I’d choose that as an example?) The bottom line of weight loss is brilliantly clear: Eat less; move more. Period. No pills, no programs, no late-night TV promises. See? That’s not difficult, is it? If I regularly shut my mouth a few minutes earlier and move my feet a couple of steps further, the pounds “magically” falls away. We all know that. Yet, because we’re in such a hurry to “get there,” we go overboard in the implementation and develop barriers to actually achieving what we want.

Boldly, I stand tall, placing my fists upon my hips, puffing out my chest, and proclaiming to anyone who cares (and many who don’t). “I am now on a diet! (Insert trumpets…) Therefore, until I lose 30 pounds, I shall not be able to go with my friends, family, or business associates to any eating establishment. While imprisoned in my barren, spartan, kitchen, I will consume only unprocessed, all-natural, organic, high-fiber, sugar-free, mostly tasteless, foodstuffs. Furthermore, I will rise two hours earlier each and every day and spend that time meditating, journaling, and exercising. I have calculated that this plan will shall allow me to lose three pounds a week, which I will do this day forth until I have achieved my goals.” After my pronouncement, I twirl spectacularly on my heels, place nose firmly in the air and stomp dramatically into my self-established sensory-deprivation chamber, where I shall remain in exclusion until I have achieved a smaller waistline.

Hey Tinkerbell, can we put down the fairy-wand and step out from fantasy-land for a moment?

What began as extremely unfussy and obtainable intention — eating better and moving more — has erupted into a full-scale mega-production requiring learning how to cook differently, shopping with new eyes, rearranging schedules, altering relationships, and devising self-inflicting intimidating goals. Building such blockades makes the procedure ridiculously difficult and horribly unpleasant.

After ramming one’s head against the wall enough, we will look for doors, finally “letting go” and releasing as unproductive the artificial rules and limiting beliefs; which allows us to get down to basics. We find something we will actually do and take one small, simple, easy, baby step; which we repeat until we get actually get what we want.

It was difficult. Then it wasn’t. It is up to each of us to determine when we want that to change.

Note: Sue Morter was interviewed by Scott. To download a copy of her interview, follow this link. To read an article she wrote for this website, follow this link.

Filed Under: Inspiration, mental health, Newspaper Column Tagged With: dr sue morter, internal dialog, losing weight, self talk, wisdom and truth

Understanding Your Motivation

January 7, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus

Before changing, establish what matters.

‘Tis the time of year for change! (Actually any time is the time for change…) Right now, we are besieged with “resolution-mania.” The question on everyone’s lips is “What are you resolutions?” We look more critically at ourselves in the mirror. We imagine losing weight, exercising more, getting more fit, improving our relationships.There is nothing wrong with deciding to change. Actually, it’s probably one of the healthier things you can.

The problem is not figuring out “why” before you start.

Before you decide to move forward and re-arrange your life and the lives of everyone else around you, ask yourself one simple question:

“Why do I want to change this?”

Why did I ever decide to do this?

If the answer includes the word, “Should,” (such as “I should be thinner,” or “I should make more money) disregard it. You will never stick with it. However, if the answer is, “I want to…” or “I need to…” (and “I’m willing to…”), then pick a small goal, and start immediately.

Knowing “why” you’re changing can be important as “what” you’re changing.

Understand your intention and take the first step!

(Want a free downloadable goal planner? Follow this link.)

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, goals, Inspiration, Member Benefits, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Success Tagged With: attaining your goals, goal accomplishment, goal planner, goal setting, intention, losing weight, motivation, resolutions

The Importance of Loving Yourself at Any Size

July 26, 2012 by Featured Author Leave a Comment

By guest author Susan Wells

No matter how much you weigh, you’re a special, beautiful, interesting person.

If you want to lose weight to improve your health and change your physical appearance, I commend you and want you to know that losing weight will have a tremendous, positive impact on your life. However, it’s important to keep in mind that losing weight won’t necessarily magically give you the self-confidence you always wanted. Self-confidence comes from loving yourself, at any size and no matter how you look. It comes from loving your mind, body, and heart.

I’ve struggled with my weight for practically my whole life.

At 26, I was morbidly obese, and I was seriously considering getting bariatric surgery. I wanted so badly to be able to start over as a thin person. I wanted a second chance to eat right, exercise enough, and stay healthy. I talked to my doctor about the risks of the surgery, and I started fantasizing about how great it would be to be thin. Then I called my insurance company and realized they wouldn’t cover bariatric surgery, which they considered to be a “cosmetic” surgery. I was crushed.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Diet, Exercise, Guest Author, Inspiration, mental health, Overcoming Obstacles, Self Talk, Weight Loss Tagged With: attitude, calories, diet, emotions, exercise, guest author, healthy eating habits, losing weight, perfectionism, self acceptance, self confidence

I’ve Got That Awkward Feeling

January 4, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Assumption #1:

Most people know what we need to do to be happier, healthier, or more productive.

Assumption #2:

Most of us do not do it.

Example: if I know that losing 10 pounds; or walking more; or spending more time with my family; will improve my life — and I have the wherewithal to do so — why don’t I just do it? Avoiding change is as much a part of the human condition as is falling in love or growing older. We all do it, whether we plan to or not.

This time of year that predicament is in full bloom. Millions boldly proclaim their “resolutions;” goals they will finally make real. The media are replete with experts, products, and services to assist in the quest. Diet centers, gyms, and self-improvement clinics of all stripes are busting at the seams. Yet, within weeks, you can shoot a proverbial cannonball through them without danger of hitting anyone.

Richard Bandler is one of two co-creators of the field of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). As I understand, NLP, in its most basic sense, states that our internal dialogue is a cause of our actions. For example, should my inner voice stubbornly insist, “You cannot lose weight,” I will develop a series of beliefs and resultant actions which reinforce that, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. Conversely, if I “program myself” to say, “I am losing weight;” it will cause actions toward that end. In effect, you are what you think.

In an interview I recently viewed, Mr. Bandler explained why resolutions are usually ineffective. Being a student of change, and one who speaks to this topic, I was familiar with many:

  • We really don’t want to
  • Unrealistic goals
  • Lack of a plan

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Beliefs, Change, goals, Habits, Inspiration, Newspaper Column, planning, Power of Attitude, resolutions, Self Talk Tagged With: assumption, bad habits, change, emotions, feelings, habit, inner voice, internal dialogue, lifestyle change, losing weight, new year's resolutions, nlp, resolutions, resolutions that stick, richard bandler, self fulfilling prophecy, self improvement, unrealistic goals

Getting Through the Holidays and Staying on Track

November 25, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

If a therapist’s couch were available, she would lie upon it and recap stories of childhood and chocolate. Instead, seeking solace, she bemoans the difficulty of dieting in December. “Parties. Candy. Cookies. Why not just give up and start again in January? Any advice?” I smell marshmallow chocolate Santas on her breath.

I validate the feelings. Although I have maintained my weight almost 20 years, the struggle remains. “I understand.”

As for the advice, she would not want me running her life. It can be a dark and scary place inside where I live. I understand her frustration. Yet, I have been asked. I push aside my cobwebs to impart whatever support I can provide.

I too used to “wait until the holidays were over.”

Then, my birthday… Then vacation… Back again to the holidays… Soon any day that ended in “Y” was a reason to delay losing weight. The perfect day was always over the next sunrise. I waited. I weighed. I weighted. Finally realizing future generations will still be overeating at holidays long after I’m a memory, I understood, “better figure out a way to work around the obstacles NOW.” As my grandmother said, “Tomorrow never comes.”

Reality is if my indulgences were limited just to holidays, I wouldn’t have to lose 70 pounds. Celebrations were the validation I used to reaffirm that “weight loss is too hard.” Failure sat at the head of every holiday meal table as the unwelcome guest, “Give up – start again later.”

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Diet, Holidays, Motivation, Overcoming Temptation, Traditions Tagged With: candy cookies, christmas, eggnog, frustration, handling temptation, hanukah, holiday meal, holidays, indulgences, losing weight, obstacles, perfect day, staying on track, thanksgiving, validation

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