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You are here: Home / Archives for holidays

Perfect Holiday Moments

December 9, 2021 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Summer, as it does each year, dropped off a cliff, bypassing Autumn, and crashed unswervingly into Winter.

The date on my calendar doesn’t yet agree, but climate pays no heed to the small square, dated, boxes hanging underneath “December” with a cute picture of a furry otter that adorns my office wall.

Winter is a state of mind, not a date.

Not too long ago, I walked my neighborhood wearing shorts and a short-sleeve shirt. Today, not only am I in heavy jeans, turtleneck, and fleece vest, but my feet are warmed by “heat holder” wool socks, and there’s a space heater glowing orange by my toes. Winter has made itself recognized; I prefer the blues, greens, yellows, and warmth of Summer. Gray, ashen, pewter, and cold don’t do much to boost my disposition.

Realizing I’m now closer to 90 than I am to 40, I’m in a place in my life where I am attempting (not always successfully) to not let that which I cannot control, control me – especially my attitude. In my oh-so-much-younger days, I would go all cranky over the inclement chill of mid-December. Today, I’m as much into “acceptance” as I can be. Beyond giving up grousing, I actively look for the beauty that envelopes me, even if painted in a drab, drizzly, dark sullenness.

To that end, I’ve noticed how many perfect moments in which my life is wrapped; should I just be open to experience them. They’re omnipresent; in any instant, everywhere. I simply open my eyes and soak them in.

My dog, 20 pounds of curls and ears, is a wind-up toy of joy and love. Adorned in his holiday finery – a red, blue, white doggy sweater decorated with a pattern of snowflakes and trees – he bounds through our house, full-steam, back and forth down the hardwood hallway, nails clicking, stubby tail wagging, an oversized doggie-bone proudly transported in his jaws. All feet and ears as he slides along the floor, attempting to find traction, the excitement knows no restraint. Dog: uncontrollable joyfulness. Watching him, the love inside me explodes and I cannot help but laugh. The cold swathed around my bones dissolves. I ask for nothing more; this is perfect.

Although I now bundle up to take my morning walk and the nippy dampness pierces the puffy jacket dedicated to keeping me warm, one of the countless things I like about living here is that people smile and wave as we pass each other.

“Happy holidays!” shouts a chap about my age, wearing an obviously well-loved, slightly frayed, Santa cap. He waves with gloved hands from across the street.

“You too,” I call back. “Have a joyous season.”

I smile – as does he, and accents it with a pretend salute as he passes into my memories. I don’t know him; probably never will. It doesn’t matter; at that moment he improved my life, making a perfect instant better than I could wish for.

Like so many, we decorated our home.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Holidays, Inspiration, Newspaper Column, Power of Attitude Tagged With: attitude, family, feelings, gratitude, happiness, holidays, inspiration, perfect moments, thankfulness

Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life

October 13, 2021 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

It’s hard to believe the holidays are upon us again.

I know I say this every year, (admit it, you do too) but it always seems like a surprise. Stores starting setting up Halloween displays sometime around March (slight – but not much of an – exaggeration.) Christmas displays have been unveiled in the big box outlets for several weeks already. And, almost as quickly as it began, summer has left us for cold mornings, thick jackets, and wool caps.

Especially after being hunkered down for almost two years, it can be difficult to stay on track during the upcoming “holiday party season,” that period from when Halloween candies hit the store shelves until the last New Year’s party has faded with the final chords of Auld Lang Syne. This is not new. We’ve all been around the block a few times; we know how difficult it can be to get back on track come January. We could just stay on course for the next couple of months. Yet, if we all know what this time of year is like, why do we do this to ourselves every year?

The answers are numerous, but at the core is “habit.”

To permanently change habits, we need an accurate understanding of what they are. Most people mistakenly consider habits to be repeated behaviors done without thought; developed over time. Whereby that’s partly true, it misses focusing on the more significant elements: everything which precedes the behavior. Not understanding the entire chain condemns us to be victims of our actions instead of their masters.

That said, let’s re-define more accurately what exactly is a habit: “A recurring pattern of thoughts and feelings triggering a repeated behavior, which all work together to simplify our lives.”

We are not mindless Zombies, aimlessly wandering the landscape, driven by impulse and instinct, reacting without any control. Instead, since most of us have functioning brains, we develop patterns – rituals – which allow us to lower the cacophony between our ears and think less. The benefit of which is that it simplifies our lives by putting much of it on autopilot. After all, it’s hard to constantly be “on,” we need relief.

There are three components to habits.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Habits, Newspaper Column, Power of Attitude, Psychology Tagged With: action, bad habits, changing habits, feelings, healthy eating habits, healthy habits, holidays, new year's resolutions, old habits, resolutions that stick, thoughts and feelings, why resolutions fail

What I Know, What I Believe, and What I Wish for You

December 20, 2017 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

There are almost eight billion humans sharing this small blue, water covered rock as it traverses its solar orbit at 67,000 miles per hour.

I know that these individuals are of all ages, unlimited principles, and an unfathomable range of colors, shapes, and sizes. I know that there are countless other life forms to whom Earth is also home.

I know that we all arrived from the same source and that we’re all going to end up in the same place; it is only the paths we take which differ.

I believe that each and every life is connected to each other via a greater, unseen — yet still very existent — domain of energy in which we are all interlocked and inseparable.

Some might call It “God” or “Universe,” or “Spirit;” it matters not It’s name; too often we fight over what to call It while missing It’s concepts. I furthermore believe that science and spiritually are not mutually exclusive; rather they complement each other. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Happiness, Holidays, Hope, Inspiration, Newspaper Column Tagged With: affirmations, happiness, holidays, inspiration, relationships, religious science, science of mind

Loads of Holidays in December

December 14, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

holidays

Because many people know me as the “weight loss guy,” they think I’m monitoring what they eat or how they act.

As I have stated on numerous occasions, should we bump into each other at a restaurant or grocery store, I’m not watching what you eat or put in your grocery cart – and I would appreciate you returning the favor. (After all, it’s just plain weird to monitor someone else’s food anyway.)

This time of year also brings out from people “true confessions.” I bump into someone who used to go to one of my meetings or that I coached and they feel the immediate need to justify their absence. The conversation will go something like this:

“Oh, hi Scott. Nice to see you, how have you been?”

“Doing great – but I’ll get better.” (A line I “stole” from a radio talk show host I like.) “How are you?”

“Well, I’ve been having some trouble with my diet. I’m definitely coming back to the meetings, but I just wanted to wait until the holidays are over.”

Firstly, there’s no need to justify to me whether or not you’re on a diet or going to meetings. We each lead our own lives. We each have our own priorities. I won’t try to run your life if you won’t run mine.

Having said that, I’ve always found it curious when one says he or she will “wait until the holidays are over” as they’ve been going on for a couple thousand years.

I don’t think they’re ending anytime soon. The reality of that raised my curiosity level and prompted me to take a look at the holidays this time of year. There are more holidays in December than chocolate Santas at the office holiday party. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Beliefs, Holidays, Newspaper Column, Traditions Tagged With: christmas, hanukkah, holidays, kwanzaa, religion, spirituality, winter solstice

Finding Thanksgiving Gratitude

November 16, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

According to a Harris Poll conducted a few years back about our top ten holidays, Christmas takes the prize among most Americans.

happy-thanksgiving

Runner up went to Thanksgiving (my favorite), followed by All Hallow’s Eve (known more traditionally as “Halloween”) closing out the top three.

I won’t leave you hanging. Independence day was fourth, Easter was next and then three non-religious holidays lined up for sixth, seventh, and eighth: New Year’s, Memorial Day, and Labor Day. “My Birthday” came in at ninth. (I didn’t know that was a holiday, but what the heck, another year alive is worth celebrating.) Tied for tenth were Valentine’s Day and Hanukah, which bears the distinction of being the only non-Christian religious holiday to make the list. (You can take a live version of the poll here.)

And, as long as we’re on the subject of Thanksgiving, as I wrote about several years ago, the most common Thanksgiving holiday traditions (per About.com) are:

  • Giving Thanks
  • Thanksgiving Day Parade
  • Football
  • Breaking the wishbone
  • Turkey and Trimmings

A few interesting factoids about our earlier Thanksgivings include that the reason a turkey has come to be the ceremonial meal is actually a fluke of the evolution of our language. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Gratitude, Newspaper Column Tagged With: attitude, gratitude, holiday traditions, holidays, quality of life, thankfulness, thanksgiving, thanksgiving holiday

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