Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus
Negative moods are caused by “stuck thoughts.” When that happens, get up for a few minutes and change your environment. Spend some time walking or call a friend or just breathe deeply. Change your focus – even if it’s only for a short time.
A common question, I countered with my pat reply, “You are limited by your own standard of decency.” When I am queried about how much clothing one can shed, I know that the person I am about to weigh is having a rough time; I try and deliver the reply with humor.
She pondered that for a brief moment, forced a chuckle, then faced the scale and began shedding everything that weighed more than her earrings; should the jewelry have been more substantial, I assume she would have rid herself of them also.
“OK, let’s get it over with,” she said dropping her jacket and purse on to a nearby chair and sliding out of her shoes. “I’m really scared.” Most dieters prefer a root canal or IRS tax audit to facing the scale on a day when the number inches northward. Judging by the lack of enthusiasm she showed in today’s weight check, I would not have lost money should I have bet that she fell within that category.
“This won’t be pretty,” she whimpered, “I’ve been really bad.”
“Bad?” I asked. “Did you beat up people in the streets? Rob banks? Were you engaged in an illicit affair, inflicting severe emotional distress on your husband and children?”
“Well, no, of course not. But, I just didn’t stop eating all weekend. I don’t know what came over me. It’s like I didn’t care. There’s no other way to describe it; I was just awful. I can’t believe what an idiot I am.”
Most people know what we need to do to be happier, healthier, or more productive.
Most of us do not do it.
Example: if I know that losing 10 pounds; or walking more; or spending more time with my family; will improve my life — and I have the wherewithal to do so — why don’t I just do it? Avoiding change is as much a part of the human condition as is falling in love or growing older. We all do it, whether we plan to or not.
This time of year that predicament is in full bloom. Millions boldly proclaim their “resolutions;” goals they will finally make real. The media are replete with experts, products, and services to assist in the quest. Diet centers, gyms, and self-improvement clinics of all stripes are busting at the seams. Yet, within weeks, you can shoot a proverbial cannonball through them without danger of hitting anyone.
Richard Bandler is one of two co-creators of the field of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). As I understand, NLP, in its most basic sense, states that our internal dialogue is a cause of our actions. For example, should my inner voice stubbornly insist, “You cannot lose weight,” I will develop a series of beliefs and resultant actions which reinforce that, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. Conversely, if I “program myself” to say, “I am losing weight;” it will cause actions toward that end. In effect, you are what you think.
In an interview I recently viewed, Mr. Bandler explained why resolutions are usually ineffective. Being a student of change, and one who speaks to this topic, I was familiar with many: