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You are here: Home / Archives for Overcoming Temptation

Excellent or Perfect?

March 14, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

excellent perfectDid you know there is an International Association of Print House Craftsmen (which has several women members)? In the day of $99 ink jets and 24-hour print shops, these folks still “bleed ink.” What they construct with printing presses and paper is art – pure and simple.

If you didn’t know about the IAPHC, don’t feel bad. I didn’t either. One of the perks of my occupation is that I get to meet an expansive array of people from a gamut of occupations; some of which I had no idea even existed.

Take the Appraisal Institute. Never having the experience of buying nor sell multi-million dollar office complexes, I never realized that a spot-on, no variation, exact appraisal on the value of such properties — and hence the interest on the loan to purchase them — can cost one hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars. Decimal points really do matter. The folks of AI are dedicated to that.

Speaking of decimal points, one of the more mesmerizing people I have had the pleasure of meeting is Paul Kingsman, 1988 Olympic Medal Winner for swimming. That award would not have been his had he been five one-hundredths of a second slower. To understand what a short period of time is that, blinking your eye takes about ten times longer than the difference between Paul’s race time and the person who did not win.

Paul hails from New Zealand and now lives in Northern California. As a speaker and coach, he helps others become “distraction proof;” staying focused on what matters so they can achieve outstanding results, in any manner in which that applies.

I interviewed Paul, and although I expected good stuff, I was blown away by what I picked up. We discussed how some things can be simple but not easy. He also pointed out that mistaking “notoriety” for “substance,” especially in this media-consumed culture, often distracts us.

However, as a “recovering perfectionist,” what most resonated was “excellence versus perfection.”

In my interpretation, attaining excellence lets us evolve to new levels. Chasing perfection however, leads us to a frustrated place of stagnation.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Business Goals, Change, goals, Motivation, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles, Overcoming Perfectionsim, Overcoming Temptation, willpower Tagged With: appraisal institute, desire, excellence, excellent, olympic medal winner, Paul Kingsman, perfectionism, perfectionist

Audio: Excellent or Perfect?

March 14, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

This is the podcast from year 7, column 13.

It’s 7:46 in length and discusses the difference between excellent and perfect.  It’s based on an interview with Paul Kingsman on March 13.

You can download it by clicking here.

You can read the column here.

Filed Under: Business Goals, Change, goals, Interviews, Overcoming Temptation, planning, Podcast, Productivity, willpower Tagged With: attitude, excellence, motivation, Paul Kingsman, perfection, Podcast

Overcoming Resistance to Change

February 20, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

frustration change diet overwhelm attitudeRarely – if at all – does anyone WANT to change.  

The results of the change are what actually motivate us.

Keep your focus on those.

“Logically,” we usually know what to do to improve our health and our lives. We just don’t do it.

Why?

Usually, it’s because we’re focusing on the mental work it takes. That seems taxing and overwhelming and not worth the effort. Therefore, we quit.

The key is to focus on the benefits you will receive by doing the work. For example, don’t focus on how hard it is to stick to your diet; picture how you’ll feel in one hour when you’ve resisted the habit.

In effect,  focus on where you will be from your efforts, not what it’s taking to achieve them.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Diet, Habits, Inspiration, Member Benefits, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Overcoming Temptation, Self Talk, Weight Loss Tagged With: bad habits, change, coaching service, desire, diet, habit, health, resistance, resolutions

Focus on Success

January 23, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Focus on how far you’ve come, not how far you have to go.

But keep moving forward.

It’s almost always frustrating when we compare where we are to where we want to go. It’s better to compare where you are to where you started. That way, you’ll see the progress.

Even if it’s not much, it’s validation that you’re on your way and that you’re moving forward.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Motivational Monday, Overcoming Obstacles, Overcoming Temptation Tagged With: focus on success, lifestyle change, motivation, perception is reality

Handling the Family Gathering: Avoiding Family Drama to be Healthy

December 28, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Not all family reunions are, well, shall we say, “familial.”

Despite the two-dimensional, everything-works-out-in-the-end, sitcom model of American life, some relatives are just not cut from the same cloth. Gatherings can more resemble armed camps across a kitchen table, rather than a joyous reunion of long-parted siblings longing to catch up on the past year’s goings-on.

Alex, her oldest brother, was always hell-bent on proving how much he knew, accuracy be damned. He over-talked, was excessively loud, and foisted his I-could-be-with-someone-more-important-than-you attitude on everyone from the moment he strutted into a room.

She was yin to his yang; righting the “injustice,” alone she would step into the fray and engage. Of course, this further amplified the conflict; but it drove her nuts to let him push his way around, ignoring everyone else’s needs.

This year, however, she would not be sucked into his dark drama vortex. Since her divorce, she was working on accepting things as they were rather than how they “should” be. Therapy, a fitness program, and losing 33 pounds; was allowing her to reclaim her life. She would not let her boorish brother steal that away — not tonight, not again.

Mustering a Herculean effort, she engaged Alex in small talk only, and the family reunion fared better than usual. He jabbed, she sidestepped; he blew hard, she refused to blow back.

Once the clan dispersed, sans spectacle, the quiet of the house collected around her, and she replayed the events in her head. “I should have told him off! He thinks he’s the only one who knows anything! What gives him the right?” Her inner dialog grew more bellicose and she pondered all the things she could have said — but didn’t.

She might be getting in touch with her “better self,” but she was far from “perfect” and she realized how agitated she still was. Sure, she kept the peace, but at what price?

The kitchen clock chimed midnight; yet she was as awake as if she had downed a convenience store’s inventory of energy drinks. Not knowing how to disperse that excess agitation, she found herself nibbling from a pyramid of dark, cubed, walnut fudge blocks that graced the center of the table. As the sweet texture melted in her mouth, she lost track of Alex, floating away on a cloud of sugary goodness.

“I really need to stop eating,” she thought, while reaching for another chocolate block. “It’s wreaking havoc on my diet.” Yet she had to admit, nothing soothed the image of Alex like chocolate.

She could stop right this second, take back control, and be angry; or chow down on fudge mountain, feel great, and look like a blimp. THAT would sure give Alex something to crow about, wouldn’t it?

That’s all it took.

Impulsively, she grabbed the plate, rushed to the sink, and poured into it a cascade of fudge bricks. The thought scampered across her mind to reach in and save a few, but she refused to give in and — while still empowered — brushed the remaining cubes into the drain.

The dilemma remained however, how to deal with her pent-up tension?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: family, Holidays, Inspiration, mental health, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Temptation, Traditions, Weight Loss, willpower Tagged With: acceptance, attitude, bad habits, change, conflict, dieting, emotions, family reunion, family reunions, feelings, fitness program, gatherings, happiness, inner dialog, joyous reunion, lifestyle change, motivation, relatives, resisting temptation, self esteem, siblings

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