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Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus

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You are here: Home / Archives for compassion

After Years of Marriage

May 22, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Boldly she wore pink; he, however, was timidly draped in brown.

She exploded with brightness while the wood-grained walls of the airport restaurant swallowed him whole. She came forward; he fell back.

A gentle, refined seasoning of white complimented her look: sweater, sneakers, and beautifully coiffed hair. From my mother’s day she came – and wore her age with proud, enthusiastic confidence.

His aura — sluggish and thick — was the perfect fit for his oversized waist and heavy movements. If not for her vibrancy to serve as a counterweight, he would have been invisible, absorbed by the background of the dimly lit restaurant.

Despite differences, their body language shared a history woven into long-term couples. They had seen much together; it was that bond that held them close.

He stared out the window, a leather-bound menu closed in front of him. Although the tarmac was busy, he was not watching the commotion; his eyes were fixed in space as he tried to remove himself from the discussion.

“What about your weight?” She asked. In her emphatic determination, there was no cruelty; simply the loving concern of a spouse who’s had this same discussion time and again. Whereby it would be wise for others not to venture there, wives have privilege; they walk where most wisely do not tread. “I don’t want to be a pest. It’s just the doctor said if you don’t watch what you eat, you’ll have another heart attack.”

“I’m tired of rabbit food,” he said, struggling to hold down his emotion. “I want something real. When I’m done eating, I want to know I had a meal.” He didn’t look at her; he was speaking to the window.

“I know,” she said, compassion in her voice. “Please…”

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, Newspaper Column, Relationships Tagged With: bad habits, change, compassion, couples, heart attack, relationships

Letting Go Of Childhood Pain

May 3, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Self-Acceptance Affirmation

Overcompensating for what my parents said to me will not change what they said.

It may seem “silly” but many of our behaviors started when we were children.  Our parents – who were doing the best they knew how to do – passed along what they had learned from their parents, who passed along what they learned, who passed along what they learned…

If what we learned as children is still helpful to us now, it makes sense to continue to believe it. However, if the result is painful, it’s time to release it and move on.

However, do it with grace and compassion. Blame will not help.

I accept that my parents did the best they knew how to do. I am doing the same.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Traditions Tagged With: affirmation, childhood pain, compassion, letting go, parents

Earning Respect

April 20, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Self-Acceptance Affirmation

Respect is earned by what you do with what you have, not what you inherited from others.

We cannot “command respect,” it is given to us by others who admire what we do.

By regularly doing what I way I will do – and doing it with dignity and compassion, I will have no choice but to earn the respect of others.

I am proud of what I have accomplished and I do it with grace and dignity.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Happiness, Self Talk Tagged With: affirmation, affirmations, compassion, dignity, perfectionism, self acceptance

We Are Stuck in Sympathy

October 29, 2011 by Featured Author Leave a Comment

By Gary Karp

People with disabilities (PWD) are more able than ever, yet unemployment rates for PWDs are still astronomically high. They have barely improved, in fact, since passage of the Americans with Disabilities Act in 1990!

What’s the problem here?

Well the problem is that we are big-hearted, well-meaning, compassionate beings. We’re wired for generosity. Compassion and sympathy are good things, of course. In their place. But when it comes to viewing people with disabilities, who they are, and what they truly, objectively have to offer, the compassionate lens is blinding, not enlightening.

Compassion for a person with a disability is a totally appropriate FIRST response.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Guest Author, Overcoming Obstacles Tagged With: americans with disabilities, americans with disabilities act, compassion, conference calls, disability, first response, gary karp, Getting Past What Holds You Back, people with disabilities, sympathy, unemployment rates

Finding Positive Intent

June 27, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

There is positive intention behind every behavior.

Everything we do is driven by the desire to make our lives easier, better, or in some way enhanced. Most of the time, it’s a small thing. Periodically, it’s a large thing.

Even when you do something this is NOT helpful, the underlying goal was to make your life better. For example, if you eat too much, your goal is to find some joy, deal with stress, or feel comforted (as examples). However, the way you’re accomplishing those objectives is counterproductive long-term to what you want in the short term. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Gratitude, Happiness, Inspiration, Intentions, Member Benefits, mental health, Motivation, Motivational Monday, Overcoming Perfectionsim, Relationships, Self Talk, Weight Loss Tagged With: bad habit, compassion, deal with stress, desire, guilt and shame, intention

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