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You are here: Home / Archives for Affirmation

Imagining Better

February 24, 2021 by Scott "Q" Marcus

We’ve all heard the expression, “It’s hard to remember that your objective was to drain the swamp when you are waist-deep in alligators.” 

We have been battering alligators and hunkered down in crisis mode for way too long.  

According to Wikipedia, John F. Kennedy, our 35th president, incorrectly stated in a campaign that the Chinese symbol for “crisis” (危機)is made up of two words: “danger” and “opportunity”. (As it turns out, the two words are better represented by “danger” and “changepoint” although Google’s translation page breaks them down to “danger” and “machine”.)

It appears that finally, after way too long, the sun is timidly peeking its healing rays over the horizon and a new world is rising.

Although a long road lies yet ahead, we are gradually evolving into this new era, wearily struggling to heal the bruises and scars brought upon us by too many crises in too short of a time.

Whatever the etymology of “crisis,” it is indeed a period of introspection and an opening to shake things up; in essence, to design a new normal.

After all, if we always do what we’ve always done, we’ll always be where we’ve always been. Speaking for you, me, and the guy down the street, I am convinced none of us want to re-experience another 2020.

On social media, a meme is making the rounds. It shows a photo of a handwritten note; on it is penned, “Nothing should go back to normal. Normal wasn’t working. If we go back to the way things were, we will have lost the lesson. May we rise up and do better.”

In reply to my posting of the meme, a friend commented, “…sounds like you didn’t like your life…  I sure in the hell want mine back!” Although well-intentioned I’m sure, that misses the bigger point.

Firstly, we’re never returning to “normal,” however that’s defined.

What we experienced last year – and continue to do so — is a tectonic plate paradigm shift in how we live. The culture of 2025 will be as different from 2015 as 2015 is from 1965. Whether that’s “good” or “bad” or simply “is” can be debated but the profound influences that a pandemic, economic crash, urban turmoil, and the most divisive election and aftermath in the last 100 years cannot be swept under the rug. Those influences are now in our DNA, never to leave us.

Yes, I miss being in plays, traveling, meeting friends at coffee shops, going to services with my congregation on Sundays, eating at restaurants, and not having to mask up or avoid others when I walk down the street. And Lord almighty, do I miss hugs. Of course, I crave those and want them back.

But as stated, disasters bring opportunities and we have to admit that the old system, whatever that was, was not working on lots of levels. After all, if it was, we wouldn’t be where we are now.

So, to that end, in the belief that we each contribute to the future by what we each envision, I’m posting my wish-list of a future “new normal.” [Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Current Events, Inspiration, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles Tagged With: change, covid 19, future predictions, inspiration, lifestyle change, pandemic, politics, radical change, social networks

Thank you for the money tree.

April 3, 2019 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Editors note: This column is a follow up to a previous column, that is worth reading first.

I’ve thought regularly that if the low-life individuals relentlessly attempting to scam us out of our hard-earned income took a few moments and focused on how they might improve society, not only would the world be a better place, but they would perhaps be wealthier.

After all, an individual in a dark boiler room, chained to a desk, deceiving people on the phone can’t be a) very happy, nor b) very wealthy. What a miserable life!

Yet, that’s as much sympathy as I can muster for the scumbags who besiege us with a non-stop waterfall of scam phone calls intent on swindling us into purchasing credit card protection, extended auto insurance, or — now that I’m a certain age — Medicare options.  It’s become so prevalent that I don’t answer my phone; assuming – that if the call is legit – the caller will leave voice mail and I will return the call at my leisure.

Anyway, I doubt my experience differs much from yours. I receive – no exaggeration – between ten and 15 rip-off calls every day. So, when the phone rang, I was loath to pick up. Yes, it showed a local number with a person’s name but I’ve been Charlie Brown to that football too many times. Yet, something inside me said, “Answer it.”

I’m glad I did.

“Hello. This is Scott,” I said as I activated the speakerphone, poised to shut it off immediately upon hearing a south-Asian accent telling me that my computer is infecting the internet. Rather, I heard an elderly woman’s voice crack through the speaker.

“I read your column in the paper,” she said, “I have a gift for you.”

I stumbled, “Um, well, thank you. That’s very nice. Who is this please?”

She admitted to being private and didn’t want to disclose her full name. As much as she deserves credit for what you’re about to read, I’ll honor that, and will simply refer to her as “Ruth.” (Which was the name of my mother, who would have been the same age as is she.)

Said “Ruth”, “I’m 95 and I I’m blind so I can’t drive. Could you come by my house so I can give it to you?”

Truth be known, although I’ve written this column for almost 15 years, never before had anyone invited me to their house in order to bestow presents upon me. I wasn’t sure how to handle it.

“What is it you want to give me?” I asked.

“I don’t want to tell you,” and then added, almost as afterthought. “I promise I won’t hurt you.”

I’ll own up to lots of irrational fears, but being bludgeoned by a sight-impaired house-bound nonagenarian who’s a fan of my writing isn’t even on the list. It put things in perspective. “Not a problem; where do you live?” [Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Gratitude, Happiness, Inspiration Tagged With: act of kindness, attitude, gratitude, inspiration, life is full of surprises, money, prosperity, thankfulness

It’s just too expensive!

March 24, 2019 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

One of my more pronounced therapy teachings is, “The child ego state is capable of an ever-escalating level of ‘needs.’”

Disconnecting the psycho-babble, that generally decodes into “kids always want more stuff.”

When I was young, after pestering relentlessly my dad for the latest whiz-bam thingamajig that “all the other kids have,” his reply oft times was, “Why don’t you go out back and pick a few dollars off the money tree and go buy one?”

“What money tree?”

“Yep, you figured it out. Smart boy.” In effect, a wise guy way of saying, “We don’t have any money. No.”

Sixty years later, I still worry about money at the drop of a hat.

Some schoolings don’t leave. I am still praying for a money tree.

In case you haven’t noticed, it’s expensive making it through the current day-to-day.

Between overseeing a household, raising kids (whether two or four-legged), entertainment, and home repairs (let alone trying to save for a rainy day), it’s getting so that take home pay can barely survive the trip. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Current Events, goals, Inspiration, Power of Attitude, Self Talk Tagged With: attitude, change, fear, frustration, gratitude, happiness, money, quality of life, saving money

Affirmation: The Cleansing Ability of Sadness

June 9, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Sadness can be cleansing.

We do so much to avoid being sad.

Aside from the fact that it’s impossible to never experience sadness, we need to realize that it won’t kill us. Sadness is nature’s way of removing the pain from our soul. Only after letting it run its course, can we once again experience true joy.

Do not seek out reasons to be sad; but do not avoid it either.

I will feel sadness should it arise. I will let it wash over me.

I will continue with my pursuits – despite feeling sad.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Happiness, mental health, Overcoming Obstacles Tagged With: affirmation, emotions, feelings, sad note, sadness, true joy

Affirmation: Avoiding Absolutes

May 31, 2012 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

Self-Acceptance Affirmation

There are no absolutes in life.

To enjoy life, we must understand the variations it brings us. There are no “blacks” nor “whites.” Everything lies somewhere in between

To expect something or someone to be perfect is to expect an absolution that does not happen in life. It is a waste of our time.

Life is messy; but I  enjoy it for what it is.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Affirmation, Inspiration Tagged With: affirmation, perfectionism, self acceptance

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