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You are here: Home / Archives for good relationship

Unfair Use of the Word Sexy – Advice to Women

August 17, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

I’m dressing differently.

looking in mirror

Apparently I’m more “modern.” How do I know? Quite simply, the label on the pants I purchased have emblazoned very clearly and prominently: “modern look,” Truth be told, the trousers look identical to the “old fashioned” pair of pants that aren’t termed “modern,” but I write that off to the fact that I’m not a sophisticated enough fashionista to recognize the distinction. Tommy Hilfiger’s career is in no danger from me.

More so, in addition to being more “modern,” I’m now wearing V-neck T-shirts. I am unsure if this is the style now referred to as, “athleisure,” but they do have spandex interwoven throughout the cotton, generating a softer feel, with an additional result being that they are tad more form fitting (not too much; after all I understand I’m 61 not 31).

However, the main point is WHY I’m dressing differently.

At first, I entered the world of stretchy, softer, athleisure-lite tops purely for mercenary reasons: it was on sale for three bucks.

I frequent a certain department store because I receive enticing mailers telling me that I can save “15%, 20% or even 30%” if in certain periods. (There’s a sticker one peels off to expose the savings. Mine is always 15 percent — sigh — yet I shop anyway.) As further promotional enticement, one also receives “bonus cash” for exceeding $50 in purchases.

“That will be $51.96 please,” said the cashier.

“Cool,” said I, “That means I get the $10 in bonus cash?”

“No. The total has to be $50 before tax. Your before-tax total is only $48.02.” She pointed to the offending number in red on the computer screen. “You need $1.99 more.”

Retrieving my miserly $48.02 in merchandise, I moseyed back into mens’ clothing, beckoned by a large red and gold placard over a shirt rack proclaiming, “Clearance! Up to 80% off!” Like gold at Sutter’s Mill, I discovered a powder blue, stretchy shirt for three dollars, which – being adept at numbers — quickly grasped that it would push me over the top for my bonus cash. [Read more…]

Filed Under: humor, Newspaper Column, Relationships Tagged With: good relationship, humor, relationship, relationships

5 Rules for a Happy Marriage

March 30, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus

older couple on rocker

I am now the father of two married sons.

Until last week, I was the father of one married son and one engaged son. Last weekend, the elder Marcus and his fiancée exchanged vows at a lovely ceremony filled with joy, laughter and happy tears (most of which were mine). Toasts were made. Shouts of “mazel tov” rang from the ceiling. Well wishes were abundant. I’m sure they’re going to do really well.

However, that’s not the case for so many. As I learned many years ago,

“Fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce. Of those that remain, 90 percent end in boredom. If you want to be the five percent that stay happy, it’s going to take some work.”

To that end, I’ve looked back on over two decades of being in a happy, supportive marriage with my lovely, talented, creative (very patient) wife and I pass along my own take on how to stay married – and happy – over the long term.

Rule #1: Love your partner for who she is today, not whom you think you can make her into “down the road.”

Assume she is as good a partner as she’ll ever be RIGHT NOW. Don’t believe that living together will make her “come around” to your thinking. If she has what you consider annoying traits, don’t make the blunder of thinking how you’ll change them after you’re married. Accept her as she is; not who you’ll think she’ll be. If she’s not who you desire now, she sure as heck won’t be later.

Rule #2: Realize that there are three — not two — entities in your relationship.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Communicating, Happiness, Newspaper Column, Relationships Tagged With: better relationships, close relationships, dysfunctional marriage, good relationship, long term relationship, marriage, relationships, weddings

Video: An Older Couple Gives Love Advice

December 19, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

An older couple discusses with a younger couple what has kept them together – and passes along some great advice.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, family, Happiness, Relationships, Video Tagged With: close relationships, good relationship, happy life, long term relationship, love, love and happiness, video, what matters, what really matters

Talk Time for Healthy Relationships

July 23, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

I learned in therapy this simple technique to help keep your relationship strong.

Take 10-20 minutes every day for “Talk Time.”

talk time

During that period, ask each other these questions:

  • What did I do today that you liked?
  • What did I do today that you would prefer I do not do again?
  • Is there anything I can do tomorrow to help you out? (Then, make a commitment to get it done by a certain agreed-to date.)

Give each other a hug – and then go about your day.

Many people say 10-20 minutes is not enough. However, if they were to honestly look at their days, they’d realize that most people spend far less time than that with “quality time.” This will get you going. You can always add more.

And, if you think you’re too busy and 10-20 minutes is too much time, what are saying about what’s really important?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Communicating, Relationships Tagged With: good relationship, healthy relationships, long term relationship, quality time, relationship, talk time

Keep Your Friends Close, Your Best Friends Closer—Here’s How

March 7, 2013 by MikeTremba Leave a Comment

As a child, your best friends were always nearby because  they your siblings, cousins, or perhaps your neighbors.

group of friends

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Guest Author, Health, Power of Attitude, Relationships Tagged With: best friends, better relationships, close relationships, cousins, friendships, good relationship, neighbors, siblings

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