As a child, your best friends were always nearby because they your siblings, cousins, or perhaps your neighbors.
Then, as a teenager, you shared soccer, clubs and summer camp with your best friend(s), and time together was never in short supply. When college came around, you shared a dorm and a Thursday morning class with your best friend. But now—with family, work, thousands of miles and half a dozen other things between you— you’re suddenly realizing your friendships don’t feel as rock-solid as they did in the younger, more simple and structured times of your life.
There is no point in life at which you no longer need the comfort of your closest friends. However, there comes a time in everyone’s life when we realize that it’s hard work to maintain a solid friendship.
Take the lives of any two 30-40 something people and compare them side by side; you’ll see that for every common factor, there are ten uncommon ones.
Perhaps you live in the same town as your best friend? Well, they at home with the kids during the day and teaches yoga at night, while you work all day and take classes toward your master’s five nights a week.
So, when is there time to catch up?
There isn’t. Or at least that’s how it feels.
Friendships are inevitably the hardest relationship to maintain as an adult. Everything is seemingly working against you. It can make even the most optimistic, confident and self-assured of us feel pretty alone.
There are ways to tighten the bond between you and your best friends, regardless of distance and the complications life throws at you. I’m going to tell you how.
Firstly, and probably most difficultly, make an effort to see your best friend. If you’re in different states— countries, even— pick a week every year when you’ll meet up somewhere and reconnect. If you’re in the same town, but your schedules just don’t align, cut two hours out of every, say, Tuesday afternoon when you’ll meet up for coffee and conversation.
No relationship can thrive without effort from both sides, so no matter how stressful it may feel to add catching up to your list of must-do’s, do it.
2. Blog about it
These days, most of our lives are lived out online. The internet doesn’t care how far apart two people are, or how out of sync their schedules may be.
Take advantage of that by collaborating with your best friend to co-author a blog.
Hop on one of the dozens of free blog hosting sites—WordPress, Blogger, or LiveJournal, just to name a few—and set up a webpage. Then, agree on a topic. Perhaps you’re both passionate about skiing, or you both have daughters? Find something you can each write about and then take turns posting every day, or even as infrequently as once a week.
By reading, commenting on, and responding to each other’s writing, you’ll find the distance between the two of you fading away and you connection to one another growing stronger with each post.
3. Eat well together
Upkeep of a friendship can feel strained as you grow older on the simple basis that you feel like there’s not as much in common between the two of you as there once was. While the bond is still strong, there’s no longer a common thread between you—like the same Alma mater, a rock-solid group of shared friends, or even just geographical convenience.
So, if common ground seems scarce, create some.
Research different diet and exercise plans then pick one that you and your closest friends can stick to together. Have weekly meetings, or write weekly emails to each other, going over your diet solution review together.
Share healthy recipes, tell stories of exercise victories, confide health-related concerns. You’ll find that the shared diet and exercise plan will soon become the minor topic, and the details of your lives will pour onto the page instead, building up an unbreakable bond between friends.
A happy life is a life lived in the company of the ones you love.
Don’t deprive yourself of the relationship you crave to uphold with the person, or people, you consider your closest friends. When all else fails, there’s always time for a quick phone call, an email, or even a good old-fashioned letter.
About the author: Dr. Mike Tremba enjoys helping others create new lives for themselves. Thanks to lifestyle tips he’s learned including programs such as Mike Geary,The Truth About Abs Review, he’s found that people can lose weight and live the awesome lifestyles they’ve always hoped for. In his free time, Dr. Mike seeks new adventures, looks for new friends, and of course, spends lots of time with his wonderful wife Shari.