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You are here: Home / Archives for achieving your goals

Questioning Your Way to Success

July 22, 2020 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

 

Being a professional in the goal-setting field, I find it fascinating to witness some of the machinations we will go through to achieve our objectives.

There are countless apps designed to help one achieve goals, ranging from diet and exercise to being more organized, to simply uplifting one’s mood. For those less inclined to make change via an app, I’ve heard of some who journal, use to-do lists, or even pray and meditate on the desired outcomes. Of course, hiring a coach helps too. (Hint, hint…)

I am not judging any technique. If you’re dedicated to your goals and willing to do the work, however, you choose it, more power to you – especially in this ever-stressful world in which we find ourselves. That said, if you personally felt stuck and would like to make some changes; whether health-related, financial, or emotional, this four-question process is ridiculously easy to use and amazingly effective.

Question #1: Suppose I was successful; how would I know?

It seems silly to start here, but the reality is oft-times we fall short of our objectives because we’ve never defined the outcome clearly. We say “I want to feel better,” or “I want to get more fit.” Whereby those are lofty intentions, they’re not concrete enough to drive us to an endpoint. Sure, they might get us started, but we’ll often stall because we don’t know when we’ve arrived and the journey feels daunting and without end.

It’s more effective to state a goal such as “I will walk 30 minutes three times a week;” or “I will take time each day to write down five things for which I’m grateful.’

Being able to identify a clear change in behavior is essential to achieving goals.

Question #2: What has to happen for that objective to occur?

Obviously, if we were doing what we needed to do, we’d already be where we want to be. Since we’re not yet “there,” something must adjust. To that end, we have basically four options: start a new behavior; stop an existing behavior; do more of an already-existing behavior; or do less of an existing behavior.

Behavioral changes therefore might be, “put a 30-minute activity appointment in my calendar on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday;” or “reserve 10 minutes each morning to record those things for which I’m grateful.”

The trick here is not to line out an entire series of changes, but to define one simple, effective adjustment you can make to move forward.

Question #3: Can I do that?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Articles, Excuses, goals, Motivation, Newspaper Column, planning Tagged With: achieving your goals, asking questions, attaining your goals, goals, making change, realistic goals, setting goals, specific and measurable goals

Choose Your Word for the Year

January 4, 2016 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

We think in words.

Our thoughts determine our actions, which guide our actions.

Therefore, the words we choose determine our lives.

At the beginning of each year, my wife and I sit down at a local coffee shop and we make plans for what we’d like the year to look like.  At that meeting, we:

  • Set our goals for the year
  • Determine our priorities
  • Set our intentions
  • Picture what we’d do “if money were no object” (I can assure you I’d be writing this from a tropical climate if that came to be)
  • Determine what we are releasing that served us well in the past but no longer fits (including grudges, resentments, habits, and material clutter)

What might be the most important item on our agenda is choosing a word for the year. Call it a theme if you wish.

In 2014, we chose “Prosperity.” In 2015, we picked “Abundance.”

This year we opted for “Gratitude,” a feeling or attitude in acknowledgment of a benefit that one has received or will receive.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: goals, Gratitude, Holidays, Motivational Monday, planning Tagged With: achieving your goals, attaining your goals, brand new year, gratitude, happiness, new year, new year's resolutions, planning, power of words, thankfulness, words

Twenty One Years at Goal Weight

September 27, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus

I entered the planet at nine pounds 14 ounces.

Assuming that to be normal, thirty years later, as a newly minted father, I panicked when the doctor informed me that my firstborn weighed six pounds six ounces.

Looking me in the eye, attempting to calm my jitters, he replied, “Six-six is normal. I promise he’s fine.”

“But I weighed ten pounds when I was born!” I protested.

“I can’t help it if you were cruel to your mother,” he replied.

Moral of the story: I was born big, and from that moment, packed on the pounds, tipping the scales at ten pounds for every year.

To explain, I weighed 50 pounds at age five, 90 pounds at age nine, and 130 pounds when I was a teen. From there, I accelerated, reaching 230 upon entering high school — poor timing to say the least. Of the 1107 students in my class, I was the second fattest. Further putting this in perspective, that was in the day when childhood obesity was an oddity, rather than unfortunately as it can be today, quite common.

Kids are brutal, so what were supposed to be some of my best years were anything but. Girls ignored me; guys badgered and bullied me.

Physical education was the lowest of the low.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, Diet, goals, Health, Newspaper Column, Success Tagged With: achieving your goals, aging, aging process, attaining your goals, birthdays, doctors, sixties, succesful weight loss

Why are We in Such a Hurry to Lose Weight? (Part 2)

March 11, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

upset-woman-on-scaleLast week in this space, I posited the theory that, with almost seven out of ten people overweight (including over 30 percent obese), the reason most people don’t stick with their diets long enough to reach goal weight is because they give up when the pounds don’t drop “fast enough.” Logically, that makes no sense. After all, a slow weight loss is still preferable to no weight loss, which is the inevitable result when one throws in the towel altogether.

Of course, the motive for quitting isn’t rational; it’s one of two emotional reasons. The first reason we are so desperate to speed diet is that we fear motivation will vanish before we reach our goal, and we’ll end up spent, frustrated, and still fat. That is born of the false belief that motivation leads behaviors. Last week, I explained how motivation follows behavior and therefore we can motivate ourselves whenever we desire by engaging in behaviors. Due to limited space, I couldn’t address the second reason we quit, which I’ll do today.

That second reason we are in such a hurry to lose weight — as opposed to in a thought-out, healthy, and sustainable manner —

is complicated, but in part due to the fact that “fat shaming” is still accepted, even when so many other tactless slurs are now considered loutish and vulgar. The humiliation and guilt of being overweight casts its sufferers as lesser and out of control. The overweight are recipients of ignorant, countless wagging fingers — in person and throughout the media — proclaiming boorishly that if they possessed better willpower and a stronger moral character, they’d be thin. Condescending, hurtful, and hateful messages are hurled without end.

The unfairness of how society treats its citizens of size however is not the issue.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Diet, goals, mental health, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles, resolutions, Weight Loss Tagged With: achieving your goals, goals, inspiration, motivation, succesful weight loss

Why are We in Such a Hurry to Lose Weight? (Part 1)

February 26, 2015 by Scott "Q" Marcus

Jaw droppedI remain gobsmacked by a statistic I recently learned.

By this time of the year, north of 80 percent of people who — at the beginning of the year — said, “This time I mean it! This is the year I’m going to lose those extra pounds,” have given up. Done. Over. Wiped their hands and walked away.

The Centers for Disease Control says that, as of 2012, 69 percent of our population is overweight or obese, with almost half of those folks classified as “obese.” Those extra pounds underwrite a multitude of health conditions, both physical and emotional; and we all know about them. Therefore, one might think that the urgency to shed an expanded waistline could be enough incentive to stick with a program longer than six weeks.

One might think that. One would also be wrong.

The number one reason people quit their program is that they don’t feel they’re losing quickly enough. Granted, if they could slow down racing to the refrigerator long enough to realize that a slow weight loss is faster than a no weight loss, they might stick with it a tad longer. Yet, in all fairness, it’s difficult to remain cold sober logical about your progress when the scale won’t budge. “Get-thin-quickly” scam artists are partially to blame for the false expectations that drive the frustration, but they are actually symptoms of a deeper problem fostering the unrealistic drive to drop weight faster than a brick can fall from a six-foot wall.

So, why are we in such a hurry?

There are two factors at play.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Diet, goals, mental health, Newspaper Column, Overcoming Obstacles, resolutions, Weight Loss Tagged With: achieving your goals, goals, inspiration, motivation, succesful weight loss

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