Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus
We are more critical of ourselves than almost anyone else. We can feel unloved for our errors and our shortcomings. We are also more forgiving of others when they make mistakes than we are of ourselves.
The people we love – and those who love us – know we are not perfect. Yet, they love us anyway, just as we do them.
We are entitled to love because we exist, not because we are infallible.
What we say to ourselves in our quiet spaces gives birth to actions. Life is the consequences of those events. If we wish to alter the course of our existence, to change its path, or to enjoy more the process, we must begin with the thoughts that steer it.
For example, let us take the overused, beaten down, threadbare expression: “I’m going on a diet.” At the point when the peoples of all nations unite in solidarity and appoint me Head Honcho in charge of Global Linguistics, I shall ban the expression; I find its limited options lead to broken promises, loss of joy, low self esteem, and eventual failure.
In the stark and barren world where one “goes on a diet,” it automatically implies one must — at some time — go off a diet. All is black and white; there is no gray; only “on” or “off,” “good” or “bad,” “following the diet” or “cheating.” The gradations of in-between, which fill most of life, do not exist as, in that thought process, one cannot be “a little off” anymore than one can be “a little pregnant.”
This perfect/awful thinking supposedly drives us to be perfect, which is an impossibility, so we inevitably label ourselves as “failures.” Those of us who are recovering perfectionists know well the mantra of the dieter who has crossed to the dark side: “As long as I blew it, I might as well really blow it! I can start again tomorrow.” (or “Monday,” or “next year”…) Once I have failed, I might as well get all of the “failing” out of my system, cleaning myself so I will be ready for to be perfect next time (ignoring the fact that it too will end up the same way). [Read more…]
We make millions of decisions in our life. Some are long-term; others are less important.
Mistakenly, too often we think that simply because we made up our mind “a while ago,” we have to continue to hold the same opinion. What we decided to do in the past was based on what we knew and wanted at the time. Times change. So can our decisions. It’s okay to change your mind.
I am in charge of my life.
There is nothing courageous in hanging on fiercely to your errors. We all make mistakes but it takes strength and courage to admit them to ourselves and, even more so, to others.
If I refuse to admit my mistakes, the energy I would have spent on new projects must be bottled up on maintaining a faulty status quo.
However, once I accept my mistakes, it clears me to move forward, making sure I do not repeat my errors.
I would be correct.
What is the definition of “perfect?” How would you know when you were “there?” More importantly, doesn’t it change with time? Weren’t there moments in your past that you thought were “perfect” but would no longer be considered so today?
Since it’s such a variable term and it’s so transient, it’s certainly possible that you are already there. You might as well enjoy your perfection.