Don’t let your “Big But” get in the way of rewarding yourself.

This one might take a little explaining…

We are great about insulting ourselves and not so good about complimenting ourselves. For example, a co-worker points out that you did a great job dealing with a difficult customer. Instead of saying, “Thank you,” we say, “Yeah, BUT, I really wanted to lay into her.”

A friend notices your parenting skills and comments, “You are a wonderful mom!” You say, “Yeah, BUT, you should have seen me last night.”

Or your spouse says, “You’re looking great. It looks like you’ve lost a lot of weight.” You reply, “Yeah, BUT, I cheated all week.”

What’s with that? Why do we have such a hard time accepting compliments?

By denying what we do well, we feel bad. When we feel bad, we engage in habits that make us feel better. Those are usually the habits that hold us back. So, each time we put ourselves down, we increase the likelihood that we will hold ourselves back.

A compliment denied is punishment self inflicted. It’s not conceited to honor what you do well, it’s necessary. Try it (and make sure to find a reason to compliment others too).

Special bonus: if you’d like to hear a fun ten-minute audio of a presentation I did on this very topic, you can go to MarcusStrivingImprefection10Minutes

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