Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus
How often do we think we know something – when we’re totally surprised in the end to find out things were not like what we thought they would be. This great advertisement from Carlsberg in Brussels really puts that in perspective.
What assumptions do you have that are holding you back?
By guest author Dr. Sue Morter, who was a guest on “Getting Past What Holds You Back” (see below)
There is a purpose for every event that occurs in our lives: service. Everything that occurs serves as an opportunity for us to come to know ourselves more fully as an empowered co-creator of our experience. No exceptions.
In the first three months after my mother, Marjorie’s, passing, I found 69 four leaf clovers. This was not because I was particularly gifted in any way, but rather because I simply slowed down enough to see them. And when I did see them, sometimes three or four at a time, a deep and overwhelming sense of joy slipped in between the crushing grief and reminded me that there was more to the moment than the obvious.
I sat down. I stopped from a pace of running a private practice, managing a staff, traveling to all corners of the country and abroad teaching professional seminars, being one of her primary care takers on the weekends and catching a flight back home in order to return to work and begin again on Monday. I stopped with the notion of everything having to get ‘done.’ I just sat down. I ‘had’ to.
In that sitting down, in the despair of what felt like losing such a beautiful and rare relationship, my mind stopped and it felt as though all that remained was my breath. Literally all I could focus on was my breathing. Everything else fell away. And something shifted in me. I felt an actual physical, shift. Something let go, and something else ignited.
A feeling (rather than a philosophy) — that it really was OK to fully accept my state, trust it, take action from that space or take no action at all, and let go of the outcome — was born.
“One of the reasons that people can’t find four leaf clovers is that they are too busy looking at all of the three leaf clovers,” a favorite quote of mine, offered by Marjorie.
Part of the reason that we have a hard time getting to what we want is that we are so indoctrinated into what we ‘don’t want.’ But by allowing ourselves to sit down enough to listen within, our perfect path can be known. My business/speaking opportunities and revenues doubled in the year following my ‘sitting down.’ And the results I see in private practice are like I have never seen before. [Read more…]
These thoughts I share every week do not have a “mission statement” or goal per se; however, I always aspire to use the privilege of this space (and your time) to inspire, uplift, and to be supportive in whatever way I can. If I am also able to generate a laugh or two in the process, that makes it all the better. However, whatever my topic, I attempt to tie these dispatches into what I consider the “big picture;” that each of us possesses the ability to be who we wish to be. Whether we indeed want to drop a few pounds, improve our relationships, or just smile more often; the solutions lie not in our actions but in our thoughts, those sparkling connections firing day in and day out between our synapses.
Let’s take that concept a little deeper, shall we?
Our thoughts — to a large extent — are altered by our feelings. If I am angry or sad, my thoughts will be unlike when I am happy or excited. Upbeat folks are more inclined to venture down new avenues than depressed folks; who will lean toward stagnation; both of these due in large extent to underlying emotions. Therefore, it makes sense — at least to me — that the more I accentuate the positive, the more I engage in new behaviors.
Why don’t we do that more often? It’s not that difficult really.
Underneath these thoughts and their triggering feelings lie beliefs. By example, if I believe that life is painful, it’s much more difficult to modify my emotions to find the positive than if I believe life is glorious. Since we are always looking to validate our beliefs, we find “proof” of them wherever we look. One who believes life stinks will uncover countless examples as evidence. Whereby, one who loves life will find an equal number shoring up her philosophy. In effect, what you seek generates emotional responses, altering your thoughts, leading to different actions, adjusting the outcome of your life. Change your observations; change your life.
I started following the Good News Network awhile ago. (After all, don’t we need some good news periodically?) I’ve followed up on a few things I’ve seen them post (such as the “What Makes a Good Place to Live” post in June). Tonight, I see that Ryan Gosling actually broke up a New York street fight.
You can see the whole thing unfold in this video (be aware, this is a real fight so it might not be appropriate for smaller children).
You can find the whole story at the Good News Network page here.
It is a little disheartening that no one else stepped in and that those filming it didn’t call for help, but that doesn’t take away from Mr. Gosling. I’ve liked him as an actor since “Lars and Real Girl,” and now respect him on more than one level.
Don’t ponder the answer; just blurt it out. Ready? (Um, that’s not the question.)
Here we go: “Who are you?”
At first blush, it’s such an innocuous query and our replies come by rote. We provide our name. But, in reality, that’s not accurate, because my name is not WHO I am, it’s WHAT I am called; it’s a label.
Okay, take it down a level: Who is — in my case — Scott Marcus?
Well, I could reply, “a man,” “father,” or even “American.” Those are all true — and actually more descriptive than responding with my name. They deliver more detail, but are still painfully vague. One person’s “man” creates images of football players, while another’s is an accountant, neither of which fit me. Piling on additional descriptors becomes the next step, “56 year old speaker, writer, father of two sons, married, lives in Eureka.”
Certainly this constructs a more vibrant portrayal, but it is still soooooo scratching the surface. For example, should I move from my coastal community to the Arizona desert, would I then be a different person? Better yet, am I still the same person I was a few years ago, or do every 365 days establish a new being?
Circumstances change, but that alone does not mean we are no longer who we were; there is a consistency that remains our core. These modifiers therefore, no matter how many we use, are not answering the core issue. Something lacks.