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“We Need to Tone it Down on Both Sides”

January 11, 2011 by Scott "Q" Marcus

There was a tragedy in Tucson last week which involved the shooting deaths of six innocent people and the wounding of more than a dozen, including the congress woman, Gabrielle Giffords, who represents that area. I’m sure you’re aware of it; you’d have to live in a hole to not to be.

At this writing, this horrific event does not seem motivated as much by politics (e.g. the Oklahoma Bombing) as it is by the fact that the shooter was mentally unstable, such as those at Columbine. (I’m sure this is small comfort to the families of the victims.) The fact that I can list examples (and I could provide more) of various shootings “by name” – and that you can understand the references – is a sad, discerning comment about the level of violence in which we find ourselves. As for the cause of the event, finger-pointing began per schedule. Blame will be assessed, and as with a New Year’s resolution, promises  will be made. For a brief moment, our awareness will be heightened and actions might be be taken. Unfortunately, also like those resolutions, these commitments will be abandoned in short order.

Positive Result?

One positive outcome arising from this tragedy (if “positive” can be the label applied to anything that comes of it) is the heightened scrutiny on the tone of the political discourse during this fractious era. Only time will tell if it was a partial cause in the shooter’s break with humanity; but it cannot be a bad thing to examine. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Change, Communicating, Conflict Management, Group Support, mental health, News, Newspaper Column, Self Talk Tagged With: bygone days, columbine, far left, far right, gabrielle giffords, horrific event, mass shooting, media, new year, oklahoma bombing, political discourse, politicians, promises, pundits, resolutions, tragedy, vehement disagreement, violence

Getting Support: If You Could Do It Alone, It Would Have Already Been Done

December 22, 2010 by Scott "Q" Marcus

I just finished meeting with my fellow Humboldt County speakers. We’re not a large group; maybe about 10 of us but we all use speaking and training as part of our income; some more than others. We meet at my house and today there were five of us.

Some people think that they can do it “alone.” I imagine they can. My question is “Why?” We are communal creatures. We build cities and societies because we like (and need) to be with others. Not to mention, that the collective mind can usually come up with more ideas than a solitary mind. The ideas might not be the best but with the power of a group, one can see what works, what would not, and make modifications as necessary.

Without a mere handful of people today, I received:

  • Support
  • Fresh Ideas
  • Camaraderie
  • A break from being behind my desk

As a therapist once said to me, “Even powerful people have needs.” It’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help nor to be in a group. It actually makes things easier and better.

Filed Under: Asking for help, goals, Group Support, planning, Relationships Tagged With: camaraderie, getting help, humboldt speakers, large group, speakers, support

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