Success is not an “on” or “off” kind of thing.
It ebbs and flows.
If one must use the light switch metaphor, it’s wiser to consider success to be a dimmer switch. Some days it’s at full brightness. Other times, it’s very dark.
But, it’s always on.
Pressing the Reset Button
You can press “Reset” whenever you want.
Anytime it feels like things are not going the way you expected, you can press “reset.”
You don’t have to wait until the New Year, next month, Monday, “when the holidays are over,” or “when things settle down.” You don’t even have to wait until tomorrow.
You can do it right now.
And what’s really cool about the “reset button,” is you can push it over and over and over again.
It works every time.
How to Get Whatever You Want
Sigh… if only everything we wanted just – poof! – materialized.
Rather, anything we desire comes to us only through a very specific process – if it arrives at all. It matters not whether it’s trivial, mundane, or life altering. There is an unalterable four-step progression. More importantly, that entire sequence moves forward based entirely on the words we use in our heads.
Step one: I realize I want something.
Many times, we mistakenly say, “need;” but in actuality, it’s “want.” After all, if we were really motivated to go after what we needed, we’d all be healthy and fit with great attitudes and perfect relationships, wouldn’t we? We take action – or we don’t, because we want to – or don’t, NOT because we need to.
Let’s use a specific example: The holidays are nigh and I know I will see family. Neither wanting snide comments nor condescending sneers, I decide to drop a few pounds. To my previous point, I’ve needed to lose weight for some time, but until I wanted to, I was not motivated. Now, having entered this “acceptance stage,” I acknowledge that not only do I need to – but also I actually want the results that will come from it.
I am in motion.
Upon acceptance, the search for validation that it can or cannot be achieved commences.
Five words to change your life
Small words carry powerful impact.
We do not live in isolation, always interacting with and relying on others.
To make those relationships healthier, a sage counselor advised me that one must know when — and how — to use four simple words:
- Yes
- No
- Ouch
- Next
Accepting gifts, compliments, and assistance with grace — and reciprocating such actions — requires liberal use of the word, “Yes.” Since no two people run parallel all the time, it’s essential to speak up in order to prevent resentment, boundary violation, and be true to our morals. We therefore understand the appropriate, but not excessive, application of, “No.” Despite good intent, others are only human and will push too far, inflicting pain. In such circumstances, we utter, “Ouch.” Finally, when nothing more can be done; the relationship is tattered and torn; the dialog consisting only of heated exchanges of “No” and “Ouch,” it’s time to move on: “Next.”
The concept seemed so simplistic that at first I ignored it.
Yet, over time, I realized its power. Simple can be extremely effective.
Part of its clout is that although this system works brilliantly with people-relationships, it is as efficient in relationship with one’s own habits. Upon analyzing any behavior, question one is, “Is this behavior serving me well?” If “Yes,” soldier on. If “No”, more analysis is in order. Does the behavior merely need to be tweaked to alleviate the pain (“Ouch”) or is it time to bid it farewell (“Next”)? [Read more…]
Eat Your Frogs
Every day do one thing that makes you uncomfortable – but helps you reach your goals.
Do it before you do anything else.
As one of my mentors says, “Winners do what losers won’t.” (Of course, we’re not talking about weight loss here!)
He refers to it as “eating a frog.” After all, if you had to eat a frog every day first thing, everything you did after that would seem so much easier. When my wife (whose also self-employed) and I compare notes at day’s end, we actually say, “I ate 3 frogs” or “I ate 2 frogs;” meaning how many things we did that we had delayed.
Delaying unpleasant tasks does not make them go away, it simply lowers your attitude, making you less productive the entire day.