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You are here: Home / Archives for Asking for help

Breaking Down the Wall: Resolutions that Work

December 21, 2010 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

There was a cosmic event this week. For the first time in about 400 years, there was a full lunar eclipse on the Winter Solstice. If you were crazy enough (like me), you went outside around midnight and stared up at the moon, which was glowing with a faint reddish tint. (What was really a cosmic event was that it was clear enough on the Northcoast to actually see the moon!)

At precisely 12:01AM January 2, there will be another cosmic event; although this one happens annually. Should you step outside and listen, you will hear a giant clunking sound rumbling across this wide land as the consciousness of the population shifts from “how much can I indulge” to “how can I undo what I’ve done to myself for the last two months?”

With that in the forefront, you are about to be inundated with experts telling you how to stick to your resolutions. The television will become awash in advertisements for gym equipment. Late night infomercials will blare (falsely): “LOSE WEIGHT WITHOUT MAKING ANY CHANGES.” The back page of this newspaper might even be hosting a full-page banner advertisement with “SECRETS THE WEIGHT LOSS INDUSTRY DOESN’T WANT YOU TO KNOW.” At the risk of biting the hand that feeds me (albeit low fat and high fiber), do not buy into gimmicks.

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Filed Under: Asking for help, Change, Newspaper Column, resolutions, Traditions Tagged With: attitude, change, consciousness, cosmic event, diet, lunar eclipse, new year's resolutions, northcoast, resolutions, resolutions that stick, scams, solstice, winter solstice

Are you ashamed of asking for help?

November 20, 2010 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

This is a letter from someone asking for my help after feeling embarrassed about it. (Note the greater message and my comments at the end.)

Reaching out to others for my own needs is very new to me and I am very awkward at it.

In the past I have been the ‘fixer and care provider.’ When I wrote you I did a, “Wow I’m reaching out to someone who is basically a stranger and he might just think I’m nuts.” Then I convinced myself I was nuts for reaching out to you and the spin went from there….

I’ve been to the gym 4 times this week, eaten decently, done some good work in the Marianne Williamson book, and was feeling accomplished, and yesterday I found myself bombarded by critics and weight prejudice in the places I typically feel safe. Which started my own mental fight and internal critic rolling. So I guess I started tossing baby, bathwater, and rubber ducky. Hope this makes sense.

In reply:

It makes perfect sense; I do the same thing. However, one of the things I have recently learned is even powerful people have needs. We all need help periodically; it’s part of the human condition.

We are far more critical on ourselves than most people are on us. If we were to say out loud to children what we say internally, we’d all be locked up. Find some time to be positive. It can’t hurt.

Filed Under: Asking for help, Beliefs, mental health, Power of Attitude, Self Talk Tagged With: emotions, internal critic, letter, marianne williamson, shame, weight prejudice

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