Giving thanks in Confusing Times
Consider this column a holiday public service.
Consider it an aide memoire of what really matters. Consider it anything you wish. However, I wanted to take these moments, particularly at this time of year, to remind us — me — of some reasons to offer up thanks. After all, despite what sometimes passes as common belief, Thanksgiving is not a caloric competition.
With beheadings and renewed violence in the Middle East, an exaggerated Ebola scare; a frightening escalation of global warming; vitriolic hyperbolic, unproductive, childlike exchanges among “our leaders” about everything from affordable healthcare to immigration; a still-shaky standard of living for far too many; gridlock in Government, and — oh yeah — the worst drought in centuries here in California, we’re having quite some time of it all.
In times such as we find ourselves, it is vital to recall the words of Francois de La Rochefoucauld,
“Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors.”
The future will be better; be assured. Yet, while we are still chopping though the rough seas of today, some reminders might be in order.
Nonetheless, what really matters is that many of us will be surrounded by family and friends, people who support and guide us.
When we are off course, they redirect us. When we are on track, they congratulate us. When illness ravages our body and beats our spirit, they, like angels, sit by our side and heal us. When we are overwhelmed, they hold us near. When infused with joy, they join us in song. What a blessing, in the midst of seas of swirling, chaotic, pandemonium, to find islands of protection where we can have a rest and reclaim our souls. To say to them, “Thank you,” is woefully, pitifully, inadequate. Yet, it can do no harm.
Spend an Entire Day in Gratitude
Although this is very simple, it’s not as easy as it seems.
Go 24 hours without complaining about anything; not only to others, but to yourself.
Do not complain about politics, the weather, bad drivers, inconsiderate people, high prices, or traffic. Do not disparage customers, clerks, or those with opposing views. Do not think negative thoughts about co-workers, friends, or family.
Most importantly, do not berate yourself for where you are in life or where have you yet to go. Do not put yourself down for your mistakes, your accomplishment, or your appearance.
If you really want to “push” yourself, each time you feel the urge to be negative, find a way to be grateful instead.
Try it for one day.
What’s odd is how the rest of the world seems to change when you do.
Video: Use Gratitude to Build a Better Life
If you want to build a better life, being grateful for the one you already have is a great place to start.
That’s the message Dr. Robert Emmons delivered recently through his work with the University of California-Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center. Emmons, an expert in the field of positive psychology, stressed grateful people empower themselves to construct ever more positive and happy lives.
There’s Nothing Worse…
I am not a snob; anyone who meets me would agree.
Well, except those of an obviously lesser bloodline, of course. But, who cares about them anyway?
Having placed that firmly on the table, I know I can be, um, shall we say, “particular” about certain things and at times, might be prone to splash myself with a faint — very faint — scent of curmudgeonly, especially around speaking and writing.
As illustration, this is the second month of the year, pronounced “Feb-RU-ary,” not “Feb-U-ary.” Should you doubt, you can find out that I’m correct at the li-BRARY (not the “li-BARY”).
I manage to keep my mouth about “Febuary” because one only has to deal with it for 28 days a year.
Yet, lasting seemingly in perpetuity is misuse of “your” and “you’re.”
The former is possessive while the latter is a contraction for, “you are.” Therefore, one would not write, “Your looking thin,” nor “I love what your doing with the house.” One might however write,
“When you’re on your way over, please let your hosts know if you’re bringing your children.”
See, isn’t that nicer?
Finally can we clarify that those of us on diets are attempting to “lose” weight, not “loose” it? (Ironically, “loose weight” is usually what started us on the path to “losing weight.”)
However, the expression that causes my head to explode is the self-important exaggeration, “There’s nothing worse than…”
This rose to my awareness on a TV commercial for an on-line postage service. In touting its (not “it’s”) benefits, a gentleman exasperatingly laments, “There’s nothing worse than standing in line at the post office.”