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Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus

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You are here: Home / Archives for Baby Boomers

Thank You Barbara

January 8, 2014 by Scott "Q" Marcus

If food is what sustains the body, gratitude nourishes the soul.

Today I am well fed.

Having lived in the same community for over 30 years, I believe I carry a relatively high, (hopefully) positive reputation. Within minutes of my home, I can stroll among the redwoods or along a rocky — albeit cold — beach. My house is not a palace, yet it’s not a cardboard box either and my “commute” to work, when not on a plane, consists of four stairs. When subjected to the hassle of airline travel, I often visit beautiful, wondrous locales and speak to and with fascinating people from all walks of life. I am nurtured by strong friendships and even though — like any long-term relationship — we can drive each other crazy, I am still deeply, teenage-style, crazy nuts in love with my wife. My hair is thinner, the brown has been replaced with gray; I grunt a bit more when I move than I did in younger days, but, even if I am forever watching my weight, my health is generally holding up, thank you very much.

I am beyond fortunate — although I forget far too often.

my coloumn on refrigeratorLast night, I was reminded when a reader of this column reached out to me on a social network site and sent me a photograph.

After the passing of his aunt, her family assembled at the house. On her refrigerator, among the collection of magnets and drawings, was an article I had written many years ago called “Five Words to Change Your Life.”

I do not recall if I ever met his aunt, but looking at the refrigerator magnets framed in the small snapshot, I know she had grandchildren and perhaps liked birds. I assume she traveled to Alaska, and she had a fondness for the iconic Dr. Seuss character, the Cat in the Hat (or more likely her grandchildren did). She was most likely a tidy woman. (I make that deduction because my article was cut with clear straight lines and hung level and centered on the refrigerator door.)

Although not directly posted on her refrigerator, like each of us, I know she had dreams, possibilities, and plans; although I do not know what they were. I hope she realized them before she passed.

I also know with certainty that she was loved and that she loved in return.

She could have been my aunt, or yours. Maybe she was.

Although my messages are posted in print near and far, and I am given the privilege of the speaker’s platform, each of us, whether as pebbles or boulders, is tossed into the same lake, spreading ripples in all directions. We touch and we are touched. Should we face final judgment, I am convinced the ultimate criteria will be how we affected those with whom we connected during our lives. For some day in the future, each of us will exist only in the memories and words of the ones we left behind. It is they, not we, who determine our legacy. Paradoxically, we create it, and do so in the present; right now, today, this instant.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, family, Gratitude, Happiness, Newspaper Column, Relationships

You Cannot be Happy Until You Let Go

December 30, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

road-sign-with-question-mark

The person in the mirror is not getting any younger.

We see our bodies change and hear ever louder the ticking of the clock.

It can be frightening.

Yet, part of what amplifies the fear and holds us back is attempting to hold on to that which is no longer there.

As another year fades into history, bid farewell to what has passed. Feel the loss if necessary, but say goodbye with dignity and grace. Remember fondly the better memories. Realize all you have done and all you have been through have given you tools you did not have.

Take a deep breath. Smile.

Then, turn and face forward.

Let a new year bring you boldly into your future.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, Change, Gratitude, Hope, Motivational Monday Tagged With: aging, attitude, gratitude, holidays, inspiration, letting go, lifestyle change, self acceptance, thankfulness

Don’t you dare bring me donuts!

December 11, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

My mother, Ruth, who battled obesity for her first 69 years, re-arranged her habits to shed 80 pounds over the next three years.

With the exception of those who knew her previously, she refused to speak of this noteworthy accomplishment. One doesn’t forgo favorite foods, increase (or begin) exercise, deal with tamped down feelings, and in general, upend one’s entire lifestyle unless the result is deeply desired. It’s a lot of effort to revamp mind and body; therefore most folks find it worthy of recognition. As I said, “most” — not all. “Why don’t you let people know about your weight loss?” I wondered. Her answer: “I should have never let myself get so out of control that I weighed that much in the first place.” My mother was incredibly understanding of almost anyone’s shortcomings — except her own. “None of us are perfect,” I replied, “The thing is you tackled it. Many people your age would have just given up. You didn’t.”

“I did what had to be done, which I should have done a long time before.” Once my mom made up her mind, there was no arguing.

Three years to lose 80 pounds, even when accomplished in a healthy fashion, is still slower than the norm.

In part, that pace was the result of the parameters upon which she insisted. Although she took a practical approach — smaller portions, daily walks, group support — her speed was retarded because she refused to sacrifice desserts. In mom’s world, one always saved room for dessert. (Hmmmm, might this be a window in why I had my own weight problems?) “I don’t mind losing a tenth of a pound a week,” she affirmed, “as long as I can have dessert.” Knowing how strong however was the temptation to go overboard with goodies, she banished from her home the most problematic caloric treats, and compensated by buying sugar free or low calorie. However, she continued to have dessert after every meal. Enter Joe; a white-haired, mustachioed, elegant, dapper widower — who might have been lifted from a Fred Astaire movie. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, family, Health, Newspaper Column, Personal Tagged With: dessert, desserts, favorite foods, goodies, mom, weight loss

3 Issues You’ll Deal With When a Non-Immediate Family Member Dies

October 4, 2013 by Featured Author Leave a Comment

DepressionYou weren’t close with Uncle Fred, seeing him only on the holidays or the occasional dinner at your parent’s house. Even though you knew about his heart condition, his death still came as a shock to you. Your natural response to grieve is understandably accompanied by the urge to do something constructive. Since Uncle Fred was a non-immediate family member, you won’t be expected to make any of the arrangements. Still, reaching out to offer help and support would be cathartic.

You would think that, after centuries of dealing with death, there would be a cut-and-dry way to go about it. Unfortunately, there isn’t. Everyone is different and grieves in different ways, and for some reason — even when it’s expected — it takes you off guard. Though you feel helpless and are trying to deal with your own grief, there are things you can do to ease the suffering around you. And that alone can have a therapeutic effect.

Explaining It to the Kids

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, family, Group Support, Guest Author, Relationships Tagged With: death, family, grief, loss, sadness

When I’m 64

September 4, 2013 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

June 1, 1967:

Immediately after the school bell blared the end of the day; Richard, Randy, and I, exploded out of the classroom, saddled up our bicycles, shot out of the school parking lot and peddled furiously en masse to Records Ltd, on the corner of Victory and Van Nuys. Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band was available! Before they sold out we must each have one!

Oddly, when we got back home, we each went our own way and collectively, yet separately, listened to our own private copy, phoning each other, or yelling to through open windows, to see what the others thought after each song. One would think it would have been more fun and simpler to all gather together, but who understands the mind of adolescents?

“When I’m 64” was no one’s favorite

Sure, it has McCartney’s sweetness to it and the lyrics were easily learned, but age 64 was so long into the future that we related no better to it than we would should it be about space aliens (which being nerdy teenage boys, we would have preferred).

Moreover, we had grandparents that age who were just ancient. My grandma, Zlate, appeared so timeworn that I could not possibly imagine that ever happening to me.

Of course, her time was severe. Emigrating through Ellis Island after escaping the persecution of the Czar, she survived horrific poverty, lost her husband at the age of 29, and raised three daughters solo, managing to support them by starting her own junkyard business.

Grandma was strong and determined; no arguing that. But the decades took a heavy toll. With the skin on her hands cracked; face deeply lined; she literally bent under the weight of her survival; staggering sluggishly rather than walking, always with the assistance of someone’s arm supporting her, her oversized housecoat and apron hung loosely around her large frame. She required rest after moving even the shortest distances.

No, I would never be like that.

Dianna Nyad recently climbed from the sea to the land at Key West after swimming 100 miles from Cuba. This was not her first crack at it; rather it was number five. She first attempted the crossing 35 years ago, in her late twenties.  [Read more…]

Filed Under: Baby Boomers, Health, Inspiration, Newspaper Column Tagged With: diana nyad, sergeant pepper, sixties

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