This Time I Mean It

Getting Past What Holds You Back with Baby Boomer Weight Loss Expert Scott 'Q' Marcus

  • Home
  • Change Habits
    • 21 Day Habit Change.com
  • Blog
    • Newspaper Column
    • Motivational Monday
  • Work With Scott
    • Meet Scott
    • Scott’s Powerful Fun Style
    • For Meeting Planners
    • Speaking Topics
    • What Conference Attendees Say
    • Book Scott to Speak
  • Shop
  • Meet Scott
  • Testimonials
  • Contact Us
    • Sign up for the FREE ezine
You are here: Home / Asking for help / Dealing with Holiday Food Pushers and Food Cops

Dealing with Holiday Food Pushers and Food Cops

December 3, 2014 by Scott "Q" Marcus Leave a Comment

santa-taking-cookies

From Hanukkah gelt to peppermint bark to reindeer cookies; you can’t toss a Santa hat three feet without it landing in a mountain of sweet, sugary treats this time of year.

The holidays also bring out two characters extremely challenging to dieters attempting to stay the course through the most difficult time of year. So, in the interest of peaceful family get-togethers and company parties, I provide advice on how to deal with the ever-present “Food Police” and “Food Pushers.”

One can tell when the former is within earshot because you’ll hear: “Is that on your diet?” or “Should you be eating that?” Unfortunately, no matter how carefully worded and lovingly delivered, it always comes across as (delivered in the tone of a schoolyard taunt), “Neener-neener-neener! I caught you cheating!”

First tip: Override the initial reaction to share what you are eating rather forcefully by shoving it in his face.

The sad truth is that will not make the situation better; worse yet, your next meal might be served through bars.

On the other extreme is the “Food Pusher,” who sings a different carol, attempting to stuff you with all manner of delights. One recognizes her by the guilt-inducing expressions, “I made it just for you” or “One bite won’t hurt.”

Although these personality types appear opposites —one at-tempts to keep you from what you want and the other is forcing on you what you don’t — they are actually related. Each person’s is really trying to help you be happier. The “cop” does this by attempting to keep you on the straight and narrow, while the other provides “permission” to relax and cut loose.

Once we understand that motivation, we can handle them — without violence — by utilizing the “3 Rs.”

Step 1: Recognize the intent of the person, not the action.

There is an old proverb, “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Assuming the person offering the unwanted solicitation is someone with whom you can usually get along, job one is to slow down your reaction long enough to understand that he or she just wants to make sure you’re successful on your diet (from the view of the “cop”), or that you’re having a good time (from the view of the “pusher.”)

If we focus on those intentions, rather than the words or actions, we’re half way there. Therefore we could now respond with something such as, “Thank you for the suggestion” (to the “Cop”), or “That’s very nice of you to make this for me” (to the “pusher”). This alerts them that you appreciate their helpfulness.

Step 2: Reflect how you feel.

Next, we must — gently — school them so they comprehend how you feel about what the action so they don’t do it again. For example: (cop) “However, when you watch over me, I get defensive,” or (pusher) “I’m proud of my weight loss. When you offer me those cookies, I’m afraid I’ll go off track and I don’t want that to happen.” We don’t blame; we just state our feelings.

Step 3: Redirect the behavior.

Finally, since they are trying to help, let’s give them a constructive assignment. We do this by redirecting them; satisfying their good intentions. Again, an illustration might be, (cop) “What would really help me is if you’d go for a walk with me later.” To the “pusher” we might explain, “If you could cut up some fruit for me next time, that would be a treat I’d like.”

To stay successful this holiday season, without being a hermit, utilize the “Three Rs:” Recognize. Reflect. Redirect. It won’t always work. But when it does, it’s worth the minor effort it takes. Plus, it reduces family and workplace drama, and that’s a great gift all to its own.

Related

Filed Under: Asking for help, Communicating, Conflict Management, Diet, goals, Happiness, Holidays, Newspaper Column, Success, Weight Loss Tagged With: better relationships, family and friends, family conflict, handling conflict, handling temptation, overcoming obstacles, staying calm, staying on track

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Search the Site

Search Products

Blog Categories

Recent Posts

  • Bathroom Humor
  • Scared of my Shadow
  • You are not who you think you were
  • Who are you? Are you sure?
  • Exasperating – the verb

Book An Appointment With Scott

Get a free coaching call by following this link. No obligation.

Contact Us Today

Scott "Q" Marcus
707 834.4090
scottq@thistimeimeanit.com
======
Join Scott's mailing list at http://eepurl.com/LsSIX

Product Categories

  • Accessories
  • Books
  • Coaching Programs
  • DVDs and CDs
  • Instant Downloads
  • Kindle Books
  • Seminars
  • Shirts
  • Site Advertising
  • subscription
  • Uncategorized

Book An Appointment

Recent Posts

  • Bathroom Humor
  • Scared of my Shadow
  • You are not who you think you were
  • Who are you? Are you sure?
  • Exasperating – the verb

This Time I Mean It Copyright © 2025 · All rights reserved · Log in