Find a way to celebrate more often.

“We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action.” ~ Frank Tibolt

“‘Excellence’ is not a gift, but a skill that takes practice. We do not act ‘rightly’ because we are ‘excellent’, in fact we achieve ‘excellence’ by acting ‘rightly.'” ~ Plato

“Fake it ’til you make it.” ~ Attributed to Alcoholics Anonymous

This is probably the most important thing I’ll ever write.

When people ask me how I lost over 130 pounds, this is the answer.

I don’t know how I made the connection – it was one of those so-called ‘Aha! Moments’ that so many people talk about.  I had a bona fide epiphany one day as I was sitting in my living room, crying and feeling sorry for myself.  Here is the story, and I hope you find it meaningful to you.

Once I had lost about 90 pounds, and I was no longer in what I kindly refer to as “the 200 Club,” meaning I no longer weighed over 200 pounds, I hit the mother of all plateaus.  I couldn’t seem to get out of the 190s no matter what I tried.  Everything I had done to lose 90 pounds just wasn’t working for me any more – or so it seemed.  And so, I did what any normal human being would – I had a break down.  I was so angry, so frustrated, so desperate I just didn’t know what to do with myself.  And suddenly, it became very apparent that I had reached a fork in the road on my journey.  What should I do?

I had two clear choices:

1) I could quit or…
2) I could forge ahead.

Where would quitting get me?

Well, I could go back to my old habits and slowly but surely undo all of my hard work.  “But,” I argued, “at least I wouldn’t have to think about eating healthy and making sure I had time to exercise everyday.  In fact, I would never have to think about ‘dieting’ ever again.”  It was a happy thought until I realized that it wasn’t true.  Just as I had old eating and exercising habits, I had old thought habits too.  I knew it wouldn’t be long before I started beating myself up for being fat and lazy (my apologies to myself, but this is the kind of self-talk I regularly engaged in before I decided to change it) and that I would start feeling miserable and guilty like I did when I weighed 287 pounds.  Then I remembered how physically painful it was to carry around those extra 90 pounds.  So, it didn’t take me long to decide that all quitting would buy me was a ticket right back to Square One.

So where exactly could I go if I forged ahead?

At the time, it seemed all I could do was spin my wheels and go no where.  “I’m really trying here, and I’m not making any progress!” I angrily told myself.  But, I suddenly thought that perhaps there was something I was missing.  I asked myself, “How do thin people live?” And I honestly didn’t know the answer.  The only time I was ever thin was in college, and I wasn’t a healthy person then.  I could go days without eating a bite.  It’s very easy to be thin when you’re starving yourself.  I never had a healthy relationship with food or my own self-image.  How could I know how “normal” people behaved?  There was no way for me to know. [Read more…]