I am “goat-less.”
That’s most likely because I let too many things get my goat. Whether it’s an age-related thing or I’m just a grumpy guy, I know not – but I find myself quickly irritated of late.
My biggest goat-getter is tailgaters; drivers who follow too closely, especially on the freeway. My uncle used to slam on his brakes and scare the bejesus out them, watching in his rearview mirror as a look of terror flashed across their faces when they saw his brake lights blast, eventually causing them to back off assuming they were following a maniac (which might have been accurate). I’m not that foolish but I’ll own up to giving that action serious consideration.
Oh yes, another peeve… people in supermarkets who scrutinize their receipt while still in line. Sure, be positive you’re not overpaying; I’m down with that. But would you mind inspecting the receipt AFTER you let the other shoppers move forward? And have you noticed that those folks are the same ones who argue over a one-cent discrepancy? Here’s your penny. Move on, pal; some of us have lives.
But my ultimate irritation stems from misleading weight loss ads;
…the ones that promise to reveal, “The secret the diet industry doesn’t want you to know,” or falsely boast, “Lose weight without changing a thing.”
Recently, I had to strap duct tape around my noggin to prevent it from exploding when I heard an ad about a diet discovery you mix with water and — voila! (yes, they really said “Voila!”) — you drop 10 pounds in a week!
Class, pull out your calculators; it’s math time.