When they doubt themselves, we are easily able to inspire, encourage, and invigorate them up with all sorts of compliments. As importantly, we truly believe what we’re telling them too.
Take responsibility for something new today.
Ask yourself, “If I could could control this situation, what might I do differently?”
It’s not a guarantee that you will be able to change it, but abdicating responsibility guarantees that you will change nothing.
Besides, it feels better to try and not succeed than it does to feel like a victim in your own life.
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Take time to be alone more often than you think you need to.
One of the prime triggers in engaging in a bad habit is looking for a way to give to yourself, especially if you’ve been very busy and overwhelmed. When we don’t take time for ourselves, we end up “rewarding” ourselves with our habits. It’s a way of taking care of ourselves in the moment, but it doesn’t feel so great when we’re done.
If you want to improve the chances you’ll stay on program and you won’t suffer from a “guilt dessert,” take a few minutes to be alone every day; long enough to decompress.
It doesn’t have to be very long, just long enough to get yourself centered.
By the way, “alone” is not “lonely” – unless you choose to make it so.
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Changing a bad habit can be messy, frustrating, and unpleasant.
After all, if it was easy, we’d all be dropping bad habits willy-nilly, wouldn’t we?
It becomes easier if, instead of looking at it like, “One moment I’m here. The next minute I have to be all the way over there,” we understand it more as a series of stages.
I’ll assume one has left the initial stage of denial, and decided to — for example — lose a few pounds; accepting that either forever gaining weight or making a change are his only options.
He lands firmly in stage one: “Never.”
Here thoughts and feelings are extremely negative, perception being an excessive, laborious amount of work and discomfort for what appears to be a pipe dream result. Internal dialog is, “I will never be able to do that” with the obvious coda being, “…so why bother to try?”
In our example, the thought of sweaty, painful exercise; a starvation-level diet; anal-retentive tracking of calories; tasteless recipes; extensive shopping pattern adjustments; and – in general – being forever, always, never-ending conscious; triggers our synapses to scream, “No way! Can’t be done, ain’t gonna happen.” Crossing our arms, scowling, and firmly planting our feet, we refuse to budge.
Or so we think.
You see; the problem is that once consciousness has been raised it cannot never again be buried.
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Not everything is equally important.
One of the main reasons we don’t move forward is we forget that we cannot do everything all the time. We stress ourselves out thinking of how much we have to do. We then get overloaded and shut down.
Take time to remember what really matters by using the “Five Year Rule.”
As yourself if anyone will really know or care about this event five years from now.
- If the answer is “No,” let it go. Get to it when you can – if you want to.
- If the answer is “Yes,” it’s important. Take care of it as soon as you can. Then take a moment for yourself.