Change Your Mind if You Want

woman-with-ball-and-chainNote: We recently launched of a seminar series, “Five Things You Must Know To Make Your Life Better.”  As part of that series, one of the things we went over were the “10 Commandments of Changing Habits.” This is one of those “commandments.”

Thou shalt be free from long-term binders.

Goal setting is not a prison sentence. Simply because you set a goal does not mean you have to carry it to the end. You are grown-up and you can decide at any time that your goal is not worth it and change your mind.

However, while on the path, go boldly and proudly.

Every Monday, a new motivational memo is posted by Scott “Q” Marcus, Motivational Weight Loss Expert for Baby Boomers and Life Balance and Productivity Expert. Subscribers to 21DayHabitChange.com and Scott’s coaching service get this – and many more benefits – sent to them directly. If you’d like to get these delivered to your email box (and get a free motivational book of quotations downloaded to your computer), follow this link.

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Give Yourself More Credit

Note: We recently launched of a seminar series, “Five Things You Must Know To Make Your Life Better.”  As part of that series, one of the things we went over were the “10 Commandments of Changing Habits.” This is one of those “commandments.”

Give unto thyself more credit.

man-with-medals
Your self-talk is the biggest reason you are where you are, for better or worse. If you wish to be somewhere else, you must change first what you say to yourself.

Look for reasons you are successful, not for ways in which you messed up.

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Fear of Success vs Fear of Failure

There are few reasons why we do not achieve our dreams.

fear-of-success-&-failure

Yes, there are “acts of God.”

Philosophically, one might even accept fate or destiny as insurmountable barriers. Yet, aside from those, the immense majority of people living lives of quiet desperation reside there because of what’s going on in their minds more than on our planet. With credit to Walt Kelly, “We have met the enemy and he is us.” We — not others — are more times than not, our worst adversaries.

I mean this not in a condescending, judgmental manner, as one might hear from no-nonsense hyper-achievers, “Just pull yourself up from the bootstraps, suck it in, and get it done. Don’t be such a wimp!” One cannot change years of brain wave patterns in the same manner in which he switches on or off a light. Negative thoughts today — click — positive henceforth. My objective today is also not designed to illustrate how messed up we are; I don’t think that’s true, we’re all doing the best we know how to do.

With appropriate disclaimers admitted, if we accept that we are standing in our own way, it begs the question, “Why would we do that?” Why do we NOT reach further, dream larger, and believe better?

The primary answer is: Fear; Fear of Success, and its dastardly sibling, Fear of Failure.

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Shaking Up My Thoughts

After the day’s folderol has wound down, it’s time to relax.

Lay on the couch please

Planted habitually on the left side of the couch, my wife places on herself an animal-print blanket she sewed, and the then places on said animal-print blanket three animals: two cats and a dog. I sit on the other side of the sofa and we watch TV, check out a movie, read, or – gasp! – possibly even talk to each other.

If you’re looking for wild parties, we’re not the go-to place. I’m not sure we ever were, but for a fact, I know we’re not now. We’re not exciting – and that’s the way we like it.

Recently, our pattern was most literally shaken up when the ground began trembling.

If you live in earthquake country, you know what comes next. If you don’t, there’s a mental and emotional checklist one goes through at the first inkling of a temblor.

1)    Look for others nearby and check their reactions to decide if you’re just dizzy or disoriented, or to get validation that the movement beneath your feet is actually happening.

2)    Determine if a large vehicle is rumbling down your street vibrating the entire neighborhood.

3)    Check to see if hanging objects are swinging.

4)    If indeed you are neither inebriated nor are tanks or eighteen-wheelers patrolling your street, and your favorite dangling knick-knack is making like a pendulum; then commence praying that this now verified earthquake will not be the “Big One.”

5)    Feel fear rise up in your throat. Decide if you’re heading for safety. Wait for quake to pass. Realize how powerless you are in the grasp of Mother Nature.

Steps one through four pass blindingly fast.

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Don’t Listen to Pressure

Note: We recently launched of a seminar series,Five Things You Must Know To Make Your Life Better.”  As part of that series, one of the things we went over were the “10 Commandments of Changing Habits.” This is one of those “commandments.”

Listen not to the pressure of others…

Woman-squeezing-stress-toy

Change because you want to or you need to, not because of external pressure.

It’s perfectly OK to stay where you are and continue to engage in your behaviors. However, own it.

Realize that is your choice and you are making it.

This gives you the power to change later – should you so choose.

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